Unemployment Blues: Losing Ourselves

Written by Virginia Bola, PsyD


When we lose our jobs, no matterrepparttar reason, we lose a big part of our identity. Think ofrepparttar 107093 last several times you met new people. After names are exchanged and polite comments made on whatever event you are attending,repparttar 107094 question quickly arises: "What do you do?"

It's a pleasant starting point for conversation and usually gives rise to many questions or a lively discussion. It also allows us to measure and preliminarily judge each other. Until we really start to know someone as an individual, we tend to deal in broad generalizations and stereotypes. By learning what work a stranger performs, we start making assumptions about their values: education, social ranking, work ethic, and personal priorities. Meet someone and talk for a while and unconsciously you are assessing and categorizing, much based on occupational data. Meet a custodian, a plumber, a nurse, or an attorney. Notwithstanding your actual conversation, you have made character judgments that may have little basis in reality but which allows you to fit that person in a suitable niche in your mental organization.

When I can no longer say proudly "I'm a mechanic" or "I am a computer operator" my self-esteem plummets. Meet a stranger and admit that I am unemployed, perhaps have been for an extended period of time, and I watch my stature diminish in your eyes. I can talk about what I used to do but I feel somehow tainted and incomplete. I talk too much about why I have no job because I want you to realize that it's not my fault, that I really want to work, that there's nothing wrong with me.

The scourge of unemployment is what it does to our minds. We may have watched as our position moved overseas. We may have sensed that our department was running over budget. We may have known thatrepparttar 107095 company was seeking to cut costs. But unlessrepparttar 107096 entire company closed down, or relocated out of state, we believe in our hearts that we were selected for lay off, over someone else, for a reason. And, being human and vulnerable, we blame ourselves.

Who has ever been terminated, even from a job you don't particularly like, without ruminating over what you could have done differently which might have changedrepparttar 107097 final outcome. "I should have . . . worked Saturdays to do that extra project, been more willing to trainrepparttar 107098 boss's idiot son, socialized more withrepparttar 107099 in-crowd." Whatever it is, you feel guilty. "If I had handled things differently, my family wouldn't be sufferingrepparttar 107100 way they are." You feel not quite good enough, not up to par. Your negative mental tapes start replaying in your head and you start generalizing about yourself and your lack of worth. You remind yourself of allrepparttar 107101 negative things you've done in life and look at yourself as a failure "Why do I always blow it?"

Age-Proof Your Resume

Written by Virginia Bola, PsyD


Older job hunters fear interviews where their age cannot be concealed and where an initial response of dismay on an interviewer's face, quickly hidden, confirms their anticipation of discrimination. The mature job seeker often prefersrepparttar anonymity of mailed resumes, e-mailed inquiries, internet applications, and telephone contacts.

Interviews, however, arerepparttar 107092 goal of everyone who wants to work. There is so much pre-selection and screening before an interview is granted that simply getting that far inrepparttar 107093 process provides at least some expectation of an offer being made. It is when interviews are not forthcoming that real concern is needed. Ask yourself if you may be inadvertently triggering screening filters byrepparttar 107094 documentation you submit.

Reviewrepparttar 107095 following three "red flags" and identify if your own presentation could be outdated and needlessly sabotaging your employment campaign.

1. Old Educational Data.

You may have obtained a degree or completed a vocational course many years ago. While you obviously cannot changerepparttar 107096 year of your graduation, you can concentrate on detailing other training received more recently. Any classes, workshops, or seminars attended overrepparttar 107097 past couple of years, even something in progress, stamps you as an individual who is continuing to learn and grow, someone aware of recent developments and open to new ideas and up-to-date approaches.

2. Job Titles.

The title of a job is designed to explain, in brief, your typical duties. Overrepparttar 107098 years, such titles change even when tasks and responsibilities remain similar. Reviewrepparttar 107099 titles on your resume that may reflect what your position was called atrepparttar 107100 time but no longer meshes withrepparttar 107101 current business environment. "Secretary," for example, is now rare. Similar job duties, flexed for innovations in technology, are now referred to as "Administrative Assistant," "Office Manager," "Office Analyst," or "Personal Assistant." Review your local classifieds and concentrate onrepparttar 107102 titles that seem to involve job tasks you have performed inrepparttar 107103 past. Then review your resume and applications and update job titles accordingly.

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