No matter how legitimate you feel they are, or how obligated you feel other party is to you, it isn’t a requirement, and sometimes isn’t even possible. Learn to meet your own needs!

2.To feel good about everything all time.

You can survive negative emotions (they don’t last long), and taking your emotional temperature all time is counter-productive.

3.To be center of universe.

There are always other people, and other wills to consider. Be willing to be trailer sometimes, not main attraction. It isn’t always about you.

4.To have your expectations met.

The lower your expectations, in fact, better you’re likely to feel, because then you can only be happily surprised. Deal with intention, not expectations. How you intend to be, and act; not how you expect things to be, or others to act. You can experience great joy planning a trip. When it doesn’t live up to your expectations, be glad you had planning process! As Eisenhauer (US president) said, planning is useless, but necessary.

5.To dish out what you don’t want to get back.

Self-fulfilling prophecies are all too often true. If you’re bitter and cynical and expect worst, that’s likely what you’re going to get. If you expect best from others, that’s also what you’re likely to get.

6.Justice.

Adjusting - A few tweaks and you're on your way. Minor changes to accommodate to minor changes, while most of your life and circumstances remain same.

Adapting - Something major has happened, and you won't be able to survive unless you make major changes within yourself, and across most areas of your life.

Comparisons

When your teenager goes off to college v. when your teenager dies

When your department changes v. when your company endures a hostile takeover

When your husband takes up fitness and moves a treadmill into living room v. when your husband takes a mistress and moves her into your place at lake

Example

ADJUSTING: A chameleon adjusts. When it finds itself on a green leaf, it turns green. When it moves to a brown twig, it turns brown. It's a minor adjustment, changing color of its skin.

ADAPTING: A tadpole adapts. In order to be able to live on dry land, it must lose its tail and gills, grow legs and start using lungs. It must learn to breathe air, not water.

ADJUSTING: Mary had an adjustment to make. She had moved across town. She had to learn a new route to work, meet some new neighbors, familiarize herself with location of hospitals, grocery stores and gas stations, and get used to an electric stove instead of a gas stove.

ADAPTING: Letitia moved from US to Russia. She had to learn a new culture and a new language.