The Process of ChangeWritten by Maria K. Myrback CH
Want to stop biting your nails? How about quit smoking? Perhaps you would even like to change your thought patterns in order to assist in your own medical treatment. All of this, and so much more, is possible once we learn how to focus on positive thought patterns. On average we have 50,000 - 60,000 full and complete thoughts every day. Of those thoughts, because we are such creatures of habit, only 5% are new. In other words, 95% of thoughts we have today are same thoughts we had yesterday. In order to change that percentage, we must first change thoughts we chose to focus on. As creatures of habit, we do choose thoughts we focus on. There are four ways we can choose to handle those thoughts: 1) We can focus on thought, which is not terribly productive. Focusing on negativity simply creates more negativity. This kind of thought builds upon itself until it causes stress, which eventually leads to health problems. 2) We can choose to release thought. Simply by letting go we can begin to make room for new, more beneficial thoughts. 3) We can modify thought. Instead of thinking "I'll NEVER get this report done! My boss is going to kill me, we're going to lose account and I'm going to be jobless by noon!” You can change that thought. A more positive modification of that might be, "I may not get report done tonight, but my boss understands. I'll still be employed tomorrow." OR, most beneficial choice is 4) Create a whole new thought. Instead of fearing that you will be unemployed because report isn't finished, you can simply choose to tell yourself, "The report will be completed and turned in when it is due. My boss will be thrilled. I still have my job." Our thoughts are communicated in more than just words. We also communicate with tone of our voice and how we hold our body. Nonverbal studies have been a part of scientific research even prior to 1960's. By example, if I were to cross my arms over my chest, lower my chin and stare at someone over rim of my glasses while tapping my toe rapidly on floor and asking, “What?”, in a low, growling tone, what would that indicate? For many people such a stance and tone indicates anger or frustration. According to scientific research, only 7% of what we communicate is actually spoken. Fifty percent is actually done with our tone, while 43% is done with body posture. Words and how we say them create feelings and desires. Many people assume that feelings simply show up, but there is an actual process in brain that occurs. Most words are associated in subconscious mind with images and pictures. These images are linked to emotions, which come to forefront when specific words are spoken. Thus, our feelings are created by subconscious mind when words are spoken and associated feeling materializes. For instance, close your eyes, clear your mind and think word ‘happy’. An immage generally comes to mind followed by corresponding feeling. It works same way if we close our eyes, clear our minds and think word ‘sad’ or if we dwell on any negative thought. The more we hang on to negative, more it hurts us and more firmly ingrained into our thought patterns it becomes. Once a negative pattern has become entrenched, it becomes more difficult to change as time goes on. This is why, many times, will power fails when attempting to change a habit.
| | Positive thinking on negativityWritten by Halina Goldstein
POSITIVE THINKING ON NEGATIVITYThe other day I bought an unusual piece of software: It runs positive affirmations on my computer, so they can influence me while I work. Sentences like “I am full of confidence” or “I love everyone I meet”. The kind that is supposed to help me so that I stop being negative. I liked idea, but much to my surprise, it didn’t feel completely right. I just couldn’t understand why. After all, I was doing right thing… I was, wasn’t I? I mean, I tried to ignore not-so-positive thoughts I’m capable of, and I was reinforcing good ones instead of. That’s good, isn’t it? Maybe not. Imagine we agree that, in order to prevent further killings in our world, we will remove every killer from face of earth. Kill killer. If we do that consequently we will have to kill person who killed killer as well. In end, there will be no one left here to enjoy peace... What happens if we negate our negativity? For some reason it makes me think about Middle East conflict. How did it all begin? Being Jewish I can see it from Jewish point of view. Having been refugee earlier in my life, I can see it from Palestinian point of view as well. But, I know very little about history or politics, so what I am going to say here is merely a picture, nothing more. This article is not about politics - it's about inner conflicts. That being said, here is my picture: I suppose it all started with mutual lack of accept between Jews and those around them. A conflict that often led to suppression, isolation, violence. Out of conflict idea emerged, that only way to resolve it was to remove problem. The Nazis tried to remove problem by removing Jews altogether. Some of Jews decided to remove problem by removing themselves from a hostile world and create their own home somewhere else. To ignore negativity and to move to something more positive. Naturally they (and United Nations) agreed on their biblical home: Israel. But, there were people having their home there already - Palestinians. Now, all Jews wanted was to live in peace, alone. So did Palestinians, I’m sure. Apparently none of parties wished to blend, to cherish and love each other, to share home. Over time, old negativity reappeared, mutual lack of tolerance and understanding accelerated, leading to bloody situation we witness today. Could it be, that trying to remove problem doesn’t lead to peace? If I have a problem or if I see one, my immediate reaction is to do something about it. I want to get rid of it. I don’t want it to bother me. If I encounter negativity, within myself or within someone else, my spontaneous reaction is: Stop being negative!
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