Don't be dismayed if you find yourself in conflict with your roommate(s). Disagreements between people are inevitable, especially in a roommate situation where people live together and interact on a daily basis. Conflicts usually occur when changes are needed and when behaviors, thoughts and feelings need to be re-examined. Don't be afraid to confront your roommates about what is bothering you. If you know how to deal with conflict positively and productively, all involved can benefit from
situation.Ten Steps In Resolving Conflict
Get everyone together involved in conflict.
Each roommate should take a turn describing his/her perception of situation, how he or she feels about it and what he/she wants.
Together, come to an agreement on what conflict is.
Everyone should agree to be willing to compromise something to come up with a solution.
Together, describe a situation which would be a compromise among yourselves.
Come to an agreement on described situation. Talk about what changes will be needed to bring about acceptable situation. Together, make a plan of action which will help achieve desired new situation and set a time frame for these changes.
Make a commitment to make necessary changes.
Set a future date to evaluate situation and to re-negotiate any differences if necessary.
These steps sound very simple but to make them work you need to know how to fight fair. The key to successful dispute resolution is effective communication. To resolve conflict, communicate with each other on a one-to-one equal basis and avoid behavior that will break down communication.
Ground Rules Of Successful Dispute Resolution
Start right. Set a time to discuss conflict that is convenient to everyone involved. Avoid bringing up problem when your roommate is walking out door on way to a mid-term exam. A better approach would be, "We need to talk about what is going on. When do you have time to work this out?" Schedule enough time so you will be able to prevent time pressure.
Remember that everyone involved is an equal and should have equal rights to be heard in discussion. To create a sense of equality, you may wish to meet at a neutral place. It may help to have everyone sit on floor or at a table (all at same level).
