Keep Your Foot Out of Your Mouth!Written by Jennifer Lester
Things never to say on a date (especially first one):Woman: “Does this make me look fat?” or “Do I look okay?” Man: (hesitation before saying anything!) Men, never hesitate when asked this question. I don’t care if she looks like a whale stuffed in a sausage casing, if you want to get anywhere with this woman, you will never hesitate. You will quickly tell her you think she looks fabulous, sexy, incredible, beautiful, or whatever compliment you can come up with. If there is any chance (and there always is) that you will be asked this question, come up with answer before you even arrive in order to avoid hesitation. Man: “So, what would you want to do?” Woman: “I don’t care.” First of all, men, it is always wonderful for a woman to be surprised by your taking initiative to plan a date for two of you. It shows you care and have put some thought into it. On other hand, if you don’t know this person enough to know what she might enjoy, you may find yourself asking this question. Women…never, and I mean never say you don’t care! I can’t tell you how many of my male friends have told me that it makes them crazy when a woman can’t make up her mind. Let’s face it. Sometimes men have a harder time in creativity area then women. They also want to please you and are maybe afraid that if they take reigns, you might get bored. When you are asked this question, give them a couple of ideas. That way they can still feel like they are getting to take control of end decision, but will know you will be pleased with either one. Your night will go much smoother. Man: “Shoot, I forgot my wallet. Can you get this one?” I know it may sound old fashioned, but men…don’t expect a woman to pay for first date. Even if she asks you out on date, and insists on paying, try to not let her. Let her see gentleman you can be and you be more likely to get a second date. It will also show her that you are interested in being more than just friends. Friends split bill…lovers take care of each other. Sure, later in relationship it is definitely okay to let her pick up tab once in a while since relationships should be 50/50, but don’t let her do that until you two are exclusive. If you don’t make a ton of money, just be more creative with your dates. You can create a romantic picnic for a lot cheaper then taking her to that 5 star restaurant. Either one will be just as delicious.
| | Time to Meet! - Advice for your first offline meeting.Written by Jennifer Lester
You have done all legwork and have finally found someone you are truly interested in. Now it is time to take next step and finally meet. Your first date. This one can be nerve racking and scary, or you chose to make it time of your life. Be sure to plan ahead. You have been talking with this person either on line and/or on phone. You have gotten to know them enough to have some idea of what they might like to do. Use it. Whether you are meeting in your area, or in theirs, find a place two of you can go where you will be free to talk and get to know each other. If you are looking for a casual first meeting, try a coffee shop. You can enjoy sitting on patio sipping your drinks of choice while enjoying good conversation. There is no pressure to spend a long period of time together; which is great since you are still not sure if you will want to. If you don’t like coffee shop idea, try lunch. It is more casual than dinner and it gives you option of possibly making date a lot longer if you are having a great time. If you meet for lunch, you can always make an excuse to have to leave, or you can plan to spend rest of day together. However it flows, it goes. Use your surroundings. Do not take your first date to a movie. You can’t talk to each other so you really don’t get a chance to get to know one another enough to know if you are going to want a second date. If you live near beach, plan a picnic in sand. If you live near a hillside, maybe an afternoon hike to get two of you out under sun and into nature. Use your date’s interests to your advantage and you can create an adventure you can both enjoy. Think of things that you can talk about before you get into position of an awkward silence. Remember past conversations. They can give you information you need to keep communication going. Don’t forget, almost everyone is interested in himself or herself. I know it sounds egotistical, but it is outright truth. Just ask your dates questions about themselves and pick up on details that you can get them to expand on. After all, you are interested in them too or you wouldn’t be on this date in first place.
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