Is there a Monster in your Closet?Written by Marije Miller
The world is a mirror. There are many books written on belief that we are what we see and experience around us. Every person we meet is here for a specific reason, whether we understand that reason or not. They give us opportunity to get a little further on our personal path of self-discovery and enlightenment. Sometimes message comes through loud and clear; for instance we may be hearing same thing from three different and unrelated sources. But other times these messages, or lessons if you will, are offered to us in disguise. What of those people we immediately have an adverse reaction to? The aversion you feel for them is a sign that there is something to be learned here for you.We all have judgments that we put on other people. The easy ones are physical ones we make of others, especially when we don’t know them. Too fat, too skinny, too ugly. Think of how we both criticize and idolize celebrities in our society. Then there are judgments that go a level deeper. ‘She’s selfish.’ ‘He’s arrogant’. Now it’s about personal qualities that other people portray which we feel are not good enough. Somewhere, usually in our childhood, we decided that each behavior has an acceptable and unacceptable level. And to live comfortably in society there need to be certain rules of acceptable behavior. What we often don’t realize is that we each have our own levels of what we find acceptable or not. And trying to live up to other people’s levels can become pretty confusing, not to mention amount of energy it costs us. As a result we start hiding certain character traits, ‘negative’ ones. We worry that if ‘they’ could see what we try to hide we would become an outcast… But what are we trying to hide? What qualities or characteristics are there in us that we wouldn’t want other people to find out about? In other words: Is there a monster in your closet? My two young daughters, 3 and 6, are in a phase where they are afraid to go to sleep at night without usual precautions. These precautions are for each of them to receive a ‘magic ring’, a ‘magic cage’ around their bed and a ‘magic sign’, all to keep monsters away at night. It really doesn’t matter to them when I explain that there are no monsters. Often I get called into their room to turn on light where they, with great relief, realize that dress hanging over chair is not a hairy monster lurking behind their furniture. The same is true for what we perceive are our negative character traits. Interestingly, what we often judge other people on are things that we posses ourselves, but that we are not aware of. However, these ‘negative’ aspects represent certain qualities that actually have a specific message or gift to share with us. Something we can use to learn from, to integrate into our psyche to become a more whole person. In her book ‘The Dark Side of Light Chasers’ author Debbie Ford offers us wisdom that often these aspects contain an amazing wisdom and bring insights into our past that affects us in many different ways. Like ‘monsters’ that my children tell me about, these unacceptable aspects disappear when we turn on our Inner Light for a good observation. In order to accept ourselves fully we need to look at these monsters to find gift, or lesson, in them.
| | Accepting Your HealingWritten by Martin Brofman, PhD
Accepting Your Healing by Martin Brofman, Ph.D.Each type of illness is associated with a particular way of being. There is a personality type associated with heart disease, there is another associated with cancer, another with nearsightedness, etc. The person’s way of being has had stress associated with it, and that stress has reached physical level, manifesting as a symptom. When someone wants to release a symptom, they must release way of being that was associated with symptom, and which, in fact, created it. Releasing stress from consciousness allows them to then have different perceptions, and a different way of being. There is a change in nature of bubble, filter of perceptions through which they see world. Said another way, since our perceptions create our reality, there is a change or movement from one bubble to another, from one reality to another, from one paradigm to another. Thus, we can say that process of healing implies a process of transformation. In experience of this writer, recovery from catastrophic illness is always accompanied by a change in person's way of being. They change, or else continue to manifest symptoms until they die. Those who change are able to see things differently in their life, and to notice that things happen in ways different from before. They are able, through having different experiences, to define different beliefs. Or, they are able to first define different beliefs, and then have different experiences. The important thing, in either case, is to release old perceptions that have been based on old experiences, if those perceptions have resulted in a tense way of interacting with environment. One way to achieve this reprogramming, this perception modification, is by recognizing element of time as a possible distorting influence in our internal programs and perceptions, and choosing to not prejudice our positive view of present and future by our negative experience of past. For example, someone might have a program in his or her human biocomputer that says, “Every time I see that person, I get a headache!” Then, given person, headache is expected, so that individual has a chance to affirm that truth, program that is believed to be true, and therefore, is true for them. Unfortunately, program always results in a headache, so although program is very effective and efficient, result is something unpleasant. To release program while still acknowledging what is true, we can describe it as having been true in past. Then, program would say, “Every time that I have seen that person, I have gotten a headache - but next time might be different. Perhaps other person has realized error of his or her ways, or has become enlightened, or transformed (it’s always a change in other person). For next time, I’ll see what happens and what is true then.” Then, direct experience can show that something different is, in fact, true. “Wow! This person really is different - and actually, quite pleasant to be around! I’m sure I will never again get a headache from being around this person.” From that moment, with those words, a new belief is created, and new perceptions are allowed, and a new reality is created with new belief. If you are interested in experiencing process of healing, and therefore, process of transformation, what is particularly important is way you describe yourself to yourself. This is because words that you use to describe your experience create your reality, and you are interested in creation of a different reality in which you feel better than you did before. Thus, it’s important to pay attention to words that you use to describe yourself. If you are describing some trait you do not find particularly successful (I’m shy, or afraid of success, or naturally irritable, etc.), then with your words, leave it in past, making room for a different perception in present, and also future (“I was shy, or have been afraid of success, or had been irritable because I was not really being myself, etc.). In that way, you will be able to more easily dis-identify with and therefore let go of old ideas, and old tensions associated with symptoms to be released. The same is true about words you use to describe symptom to be released. Consider element of time, and be able to describe symptom to yourself as you experience in present moment. If you say, “It hurts all day,” you may not be noticing that, in fact, it doesn’t hurt so much right now. If you say, “The symptom comes and goes,” and if you do not experience it right now, you expect it to return. It is more effective to describe your experience in present moment, acknowledging what is true now, and with a positive orientation toward a positive future (“It’s better now than it has been. In fact, it really seems to be getting better and better.”) The positive mental attitude is, of course, an element useful for enjoying best quality of life achievable. For process of healing, however, it is essential. Whatever you visualize, you improve probability of happening. The images or pictures that you put into your consciousness have more of a tendency to happen. If you continue to put into your consciousness pictures of yourself suffering, you tend to continue that condition. It does not even matter what emotion you have with picture - it is picture that is important. Thus, if you have a picture of what you do not want, you are still having a tendency to fill your consciousness with that picture, and therefore, to create that.
|
