Is there a Monster in your Closet?Written by Marije Miller
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While I was working with Barbara, a client, I noticed in our conversations that she quite frequently brought up judgments in managing one of her employees. She’d managed many people over years and never had any real specific problems, but somehow this person wasn’t ‘going along with program’, as she said. This person was put under her leadership against her wishes and now she had to deal with him. The employee did things that were, to Barbara, unacceptable. He finished projects too late and did an abominable job with it… Not following guidelines and leaving suggestions and feedback unused. The more Barbara complained about this person, more I saw mirroring between her and her employee. A sore point in Barbara’s own work situation was lack of communication and trust she felt from her upper management, which made her doubt herself. When I explained to Barbara principle of mirroring aspects, she immediately drew parallel between her situation and her issue with her employee. She, in fact, was not communicating clearly her expectations to her employee, whom, like Barbara, didn’t feel trusted by her to come and ask for input! Understanding these dynamics helped Barbara create new and improved relationships with all her coworkers, based on more open communication and trust. In our own lives when we look at what our anger towards others actually has to teach us, we may find out that it helps us realize that someone oversteps our boundaries. Or if we, for instance, get very nervous before a public speaking engagement, we may realize that anxiety actually aids us by making sure we prepare well in advance. So next time, when you become aware of a ‘negative’ quality in yourself, instead of judging it as a flaw, turn on your own Inner Light and see how or what it actually has to teach you about yourself. You are, in fact, your own best teacher.
Marije is a Certified Comprehensive Coach and a member of Coachville, 24/7 Coaching, IAC, Peer Resources and E-Women Network. She can be reached at (530) 274-7568 or visit her website at www.yourgreatestlife.com.
| | Accepting Your HealingWritten by Martin Brofman, PhD
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It is important, then, to have in your consciousness a picture of final positive result that you are working toward, as a reminder of your goal. When you are receiving a healing, optimally it should be with expectancy of being healed. At very least, it must not be with disbelief and resistance, which stop process. You do not have to believe in method or system, but you must remain open to possibility of it working for you. If you do believe in healing, then during healing you can remind yourself that your healing is happening now. After healing has happened, you can see whether results are partial or total, so far. Sometimes, full effects of healing are immediately apparent, although often there are continuing positive effects that manifest during days or weeks following healing act. When healing is total, and no symptoms are experienced, know that you are healed, and just get on with rest of your life. When full effects of healing have not yet been experienced, it is important to continue to remind yourself that healing has happened, and that effects are on way. Rather than continuing to see yourself in your old bubble, see yourself in your new bubble, one you are moving toward. See yourself healed, in future. In changing your bubble, or moving from any one reality to any other, there are three steps: 1. Decide what will be true in new reality. For example, you can decide, “In new reality, when healing is complete, pain will be gone,” or “Reading will be easier,” or “The tumor will be gone.” 2. Encourage perception that it’s happening now. While it’s true that you are moving toward some goal in future, and holding perception of success at some point in future, process of reinforcement must happen in present moment. The idea is to examine your perceptions of what is happening now, in moment of experience. “The pain now is less than it was before. The healing must be happening now,” or “The letters I see are a bit clearer now than before,” or “Perhaps tumor is actually a bit smaller now. Anyway, my consciousness feels more clear now, so I know that something positive is happening.” Positive thinking is not self-deception. Even when there are highs and lows in experience of symptoms, it’s important to see that lows are where highs used to be, so that even on your current worst days, you feel better than you used to feel on your previous best days. In other words, even on days when symptoms are being experienced, it can be noticed that they are not so severe as before (when that is true), and you are thus able to hold a perception of a positive direction. The idea is to give yourself reasons to believe in process, while at same time, acknowledging what is true, on physical level. It is, after all, measurement on physical level that shows effects of work being done in consciousness. Each improvement in condition on physical level should be acknowledged, and owned, as evidence that healing is happening now. If conditions on physical level have been measured as continuing to deteriorate, it must be clear that something has not been working, so that steps can be taken to correct situation, and continue healing process. Even this necessary correction can be seen as part of healing, and in fact, it is. It brings person one step closer to final result of being healed. 3. Decide and know that now, it’s true. You continue encouragement process until you experience yourself symptom-free. When that happens, you must consider possibility that you may never again experience that symptom. When pain is gone, it may be gone for good. When you see clearly, you accept it as your new normal state. When healing is complete, you must see yourself as healed, and in that way, we say that you own healing. You identify state of consciousness you experience, and your view of world from that state of consciousness, as normal and usual for you, even if it is your new normal way of being. If symptom was evidenced on basis of medical tests, look forward to new tests that show you as free of those symptoms. After all, healed is healed, and on all levels. If tests show improvement, but not yet total results, know that you are moving in a positive direction, and that there is still a bit further to go. If you have been working on yourself, continue, accepting progress you have made thus far. If you have been working with others healing you, you can know that it was a partial healing, and that next one can take you further along, or be one that is last you will ever need. When you have feedback on physical level that shows effects of healing work you have been doing, accept it and trust it, and when you have a clean bill of health, find other things to do with your consciousness than correcting problems. Get creative, and set goals, watching them manifest, creating with tools you have learned to use, a life in which you are happy and fulfilled. In fact, you may consider sharing your success story with others. Many healers and teachers of healing have started on this path through necessity of healing themselves. Thus, when they share their stories, it is from their personal experience. That was way it worked for me. Perhaps it can work that way for you, too. Let everyone know that anything can be healed. (from Anything Can Be Healed, by Martin Brofman, Ph.D.)
A pioneer in spiritual healing, vision improvement, and exploring the nature of the body/mind interface, MARTIN BROFMAN is the author of the revolutionary book Anything Can Be Healed - a manual for the Body Mirror System of Healing, which he developed through his research and experience while healing himself of terminal illness in 1975. He and others he has trained present these healing tools worldwide. See his website at http://www.healer.ch.
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