The neurophysiological dynamics of understanding each email message is very complex. From that complexity, three basic phases float to
top that you will want to become familiar with. I'd like to label these: (1) association phase, (2) connection phase, and (3) reaction phase. Let us look at each of them and discover how writer and reader can assume a more active role.In Association Phase, sender’s words are read and converted to an image in reader’s mind, optimally it should be same image writer held in his mind. Sometimes, writer’s words lack enough information and recipient cannot grasp image. The word count has nothing to do with creation of an image. I have read long emails that dance around any possibility of creating an image even if recipient could read between lines.
The first question I ask myself when receiving an email is: "Is what they are saying giving me enough information so I can form a clear image?" If not, I ask, "Am I in an open space at moment to translate this image?" Sometimes, when pressed for time or there’s too many thoughts swirling in my head, space isn't available. If not in right space, I move email to a "to be read later" subfolder, and schedule a follow-up time to reread.
Later, after returning, and in a good space to reread, and image is still not appearing, I send a reply email to sender asking for clarity. My language usually goes something like this: "Thank you for your email. I have read it several times and can't seem to form a clear image of what you are asking. Could you please ask again in a different way so that I can give it my full attention and respect it deserves?"
If email covers several subjects that are confusingly intermixed, I will also include some additional language like this: "When I write emails with various topics, I find it beneficial to create separate topic titles that focus on what comes next. Could you possibly do this to add to clarity?"
It is sender’s responsibility to convert their image into words. They should have right words that reader can transform back into same image given. Don't take on writer’s responsibility,or make assumptions, it only leads to miscommunication. If you do, image they form of you will be off kilter and negative.
The Connection Phase. When writing your response, you will want to make sure that reader receives a clear image of what you are sending as well.
This means that your words need to match return image you want to convey. If topic is about apples, you do not want to add an orange in middle of apple image. Match apples to apples first because that was responding to original image.
If you need to add an orange for topic support, place information after apple discussion so as not to distort original image. This lets receiver digest apple and then tells them that another image is about to come. Their mind will prepare space for new image. When offering orange, tell them purpose of orange and why you are adding image. This way reader knows how to open a new file.
