Control Your Emotions and Reach the Top!

Written by Carole Nicolaides


© 2002 Carole Nicolaides http://www.progressiveleadership.com

Socrates knew it all along. If you want to succeed in life you must “know thyself.” This isrepparttar first step for everything and for anybody who wants to make a difference in his or her life. The ability to listen to our own emotions, wants, desires and needs is as important as listening to others. In addition, puttingrepparttar 106580 understanding of your emotions (and those of others) into practice is equally important. There are times all of us want to lash out at our superiors or peers for violating our boundaries, not “getting it”, interfering with our projects, crossingrepparttar 106581 line, stepping behind our backs, taking advantage of our absence and simply playingrepparttar 106582 old and cold business game.

Those are only natural feelings. Everyone has had them from time to time. However, what you DO with those feelings and emotions is what counts. Controlling your anger and frustration and learning to perform more productively under stressful circumstances isrepparttar 106583 defining factor.

Unfortunately, changing your emotional response to others is considered a “lifestyle change”. And, as we all know, those arerepparttar 106584 most difficult to implement and maintain. If changing unproductive habits were as simple as being aware of them, we'd all be living ideal lives. Changing habits and behaviors takes more than awareness and self-knowledge. This is why traditional training (such as books, audio tapes, video training and workshops) often falls short in creating long-term change. They don’t offer a consistent support system…repparttar 106585 one thing that is vital to maintaining new behaviors.

I recommend that you find a mentor or coach to assist with this process. After all, there is an elegant beauty apparent in people that can remain calm when no one else can. Aristotle said, “Anyone can become angry - that is easy. But to be angry withrepparttar 106586 right person, torepparttar 106587 right degree, atrepparttar 106588 right time, forrepparttar 106589 right purpose, inrepparttar 106590 right way - this is not easy.”

The insights below will help you lay down a solid foundation for managing your emotions and progressing forward in your career.

1.Learn rather than defend. Instead of going into a defensive mode and trying to protect or force your views, learn fromrepparttar 106591 situation. Ask yourself what is really going on with that upset employee or coworker. The old saying is true, “When you change someone’s point-of-view against their will, you’ve never truly changed them.” Fromrepparttar 106592 moment you lose control and retaliate (even if you are right) you’ve lostrepparttar 106593 battle. However, by controlling your emotions and investigatingrepparttar 106594 other’s viewpoint, you open yourself to a calm and enlightening discussion.

12 Tips For More Successful Negotiations

Written by Tony L. Callahan


Whether you are working on a joint business venture, a new job,repparttar price of an auto or your child's new curfew, negotiation is a key success skill. So how can you improve your negotiation skills? Here are a dozen techniques I try to practice in every negotiation.

1. Be Prepared This is not justrepparttar 106579 motto ofrepparttar 106580 Boy Scouts. Preparation isrepparttar 106581 single most important element in successful negotiations. In negotiations, information is power. The more relevant information you have,repparttar 106582 better your position is. Preparation for your negotiations can not be overdone. Allow yourself adequate time to prepare prior entering any negotiation.

2. Understand The Needs Of Your "Adversary" Your "adversary" in this context isrepparttar 106583 other party inrepparttar 106584 negotiation. Your relationship with this party may not normally be described as adversarial, forrepparttar 106585 purposes of this discussion we will viewrepparttar 106586 negotiation as an adversarial relationship.

Put yourself in your adversary's shoes. What would they like to gain fromrepparttar 106587 negotiation? Write down as many possible goals as you can think of. Prioritize your list inrepparttar 106588 order that you believe your adversary would. Identifyrepparttar 106589 items you are willing to negotiate and those items which are nonnegotiable.

3. Know What Your Needs Are What do you need out ofrepparttar 106590 negotiations? More money? More flexibility? Better opportunities? Access to broader markets? Make a list of those things you would like to receive as a result ofrepparttar 106591 negotiations. Refine and prioritize your list before startingrepparttar 106592 negotiation. Identifyrepparttar 106593 items you are willing to negotiate and those items which are nonnegotiable. This list andrepparttar 106594 one created above will allow you to know what your true "bottom line" is.

4. Most Negotiations Involve On Going Relationships Withrepparttar 106595 exception of large purchases, most negotiations involve parties involved in a long term relationship. Whetherrepparttar 106596 relationship is family, friends or business associates, it will be necessary to continue to deal with your "adversary" outsiderepparttar 106597 context ofrepparttar 106598 negotiation. Always be sensitive torepparttar 106599 potential impact of your negotiations on these relationships.

5. Every Negotiation Is Different Negotiating with a loved one is different than buying an automobile. Buying an automobile is different from negotiating with a new employer. They key difference isrepparttar 106600 relationship you wish to have with your adversary oncerepparttar 106601 negotiations are complete. When negotiating with a loved one, you may be willing to make more concessions inrepparttar 106602 interest of harmony. When buying an automobile harmony may be less important than paying a fair price. Keep these intangibles in mind when creating and prioritizing your lists.

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