We live in a fallen world. Adam and Eve’s sin cursed us all and pain and suffering entered world. To deal with hurts, western civilization often employs economic relief to ease our woes. Men are cursed to toil to live, spawning a competitive marketplace where king of hill wins. Children, at a young age, learn to play this game as well, and even when grown, same rules apply. He who gets promotion, makes most money, and has most toys wins, at least in world system. But, that old adage, that you can’t take it with you, is still a truth to spoil this road to happiness.

Despite this truism, it doesn’t stop so many from seeking fulfillment through materialism, when real happiness lies within one’s own heart. I, myself, have sacrificed this part of myself, and let it get hardened by difficulties of life. I wasn’t chasing proverbial American dream. After all, I’ve been thrice divorced. The title for my life should be “Paradise Lost.” I was consumed with responsibility caring for my two children that I’ve raised alone. I was very proud of that fact too. I gave up my work that I enjoyed doing fiscal and HR work, and taught myself computers because I could make a lot more money, afford a house on my own, and buy that yellow Mustang I’ve always wanted. You sell your soul for such ambitions. Did chasing that rainbow allow me to follow my passion – absolutely not! What I ended up with, was what many IT professionals achieve – severe burnout, and a boring job that I can hardly stand to drag my butt to each morning.

This trip to Maine, my mother made an off-the-cuff comment that I felt that I was an abused child. By her tone of voice, I could tell she took this personally, and it bothered her greatly. I’m assuming my attempts at getting help for myself, were to her, a way of transferring blame onto her for my issues in my life. That has never been my intent. At some point we all have to stop blaming our parents, circumstances, and start taking responsibility for our own problems and healing. I could see, however, that I had shared too much with her about my process, which I thought would be exciting to her, and she misinterpreted it, partly, I believe, because of differences in our spiritual views.

After pondering this incident, and many others that had occurred in my life, what I discovered was, that we’re all broken, as a result of sin committed first by Adam and Eve. We all make mistakes and this affects not only ourselves, but our families. Personally, I have adversely affected my children’s lives in ways that may require them to seek psychotherapy or spiritual counseling, and so did my mother, father, and their parents. We can’t help it – we’re members of a fallen race.

Fortunately, we can find redemption, with Lord’s help, with forgiveness for ourselves, and by forgiving those who have sinned against us. It’s easier to forgive when we look at it from words of Jesus, himself, in John 8:7, “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first,” in speaking of woman caught in adultery. We are all sinners, who am I to judge another when I too am a sinner. Judgment is mentioned again as Luke quotes Jesus again in Luke 6:41, “And why do you look at speck in your brother’s eye, but do not perceive plank in your own eye?” These perspectives help us learn to forgive. Hurting people hurt others, and if we possess our own degree of brokenness, we have hurt others as well. It makes loving your enemies, and forgiving your parents when you choose perspective of Jesus.