Can We Talk?Written by Louise Morganti Kaelin
One of easiest ways to complicate our lives is in area of interpersonal relationships, and closer people are to us, more complicated it can get! Misunderstandings arise in blink of an eye: a poor choice of words, an unconscious gesture, an incorrect interpretation, sometimes a deliberate attack. All of these cause strain on our relationships and stress on all parties involved. Open, clear - and immediate - communication is key to maintaining joy in relationships. Some people enjoy challenge and adrenaline rush of a good verbal fight. But even those can turn on a dime. Here are some tips for keeping your relationships smooth and stress-free. 1. Don't Assume. You know what that makes of U and ME! When you're not sure, ask what person meant. And even more importantly, when you ARE sure, ask what person meant. How many times have you been angry with someone, talked about it, and found yourself saying 'I thought you meant.'? 2. Don't Interpret Initial Responses or Unconscious Gestures. This has been a hard one for me to learn. If I suggest something and my husband makes a (usually unconscious) face, I take it as a no. I get hurt or angry and then I tend to withdraw (if he's lucky!). After 9 years, I am just beginning to get point that he needs time to mull over suggestion and rearrange his planned day. In past, by time he got around to 'Are you ready to (whatever I had suggested)?', I'd say no. I'd figure that he didn't really want to do it and it wasn't going to be fun if he was there under duress. What he's finally helped me see is that I was putting him in a box, not allowing him time to evaluate suggestion, which I'd usually had hours to do before suggesting it to him! He also pointed out that if he didn't really want to do something, he never asked me if I was 'ready' to do it or he'd say so right away.
| | Decorate Your Love LifeWritten by Cynthia Perkins, M.Ed.
You have permission to publish this article electronically or in print, free of charge, providing entire byline is included and content is left unchanged. If you use it, please notify me at cynthiap@frognet.netDecorate Your Love Life By Cynthia Perkins, M.Ed. © 2003 Christmas time, Winter Solstice or whatever holiday you celebrate provides you with an abundance of ways to have fun with your partner and spice things up in bedroom or whatever room you like. With all gift giving and decorating, you can use this as an opportunity to decorate your love life. To give your lover a real treat, you can wrap your naked self in wrapping paper or a big red bow or cover your birthday suit with a variety of small bows strategically placed and lie underneath Xmas tree to be unwrapped. There are numerous variations you could add to that scenario, such as hanging or inserting candy canes in “special places” or melting chocolate and pouring it over those “special places,” (after it has cooled, of course), to be licked off. Visit your local adult toy store and fill a stocking with a variety of your lover’s favorite naughty toys or some new ones that you have never tried as a couple. Hide a special gift such as a lovely thong or sexy briefs on Xmas tree for your lover to find. You could make a thong out of ribbon and use tinsel as your boa or wrap around and dance for your lover. You could also put some bells on your bows or your ribbon for a little added jingle. Share a box of holiday chocolates by feeding them to one another with your fingers and eating them off each other’s bodies. Don’t forget to softly lick each other’s fingers clean.
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