One of my favorite quotes comes from John Powell. In his book, The Secret of Staying in Love, he wrote that "the genius of good communication is to be totally kind and totally honest at same time." I repeat this quote often to remind myself how to approach teaching people how to treat me. If I do not tell truth about what works for me, I cannot expect another person to honor and respect it. Learning to teach people how to treat us takes practice.

You may still have folks who have been in your life for a long time who take advantage of you, treat you poorly, or are angry, abusive or violent. A habit has been established and they may like it a lot! Consider telling them truth about how their behavior affects you and what changes would make relationship feel more respectful and caring for you. Be both honest and kind. Be prepared to have to repeat this information consistently over time. It is sometimes "inconvenient" for these folks to remember that you have now stated your preferences. They may not want to change. Holding these boundaries also requires attention on your part. Once you have asked for change, you must insist on it or consider giving up relationship. Both of these tasks take positive self-esteem and self-confidence.

Relationships worth having are mutually respectful and responsive. Think about how you might like to apply these thoughts in your daily life.

As important as having that great friendship is, it is also good to remember not to let friendship get out hand. Is it possible to let a friendship get carried away? Yes, in a relationship it is. It is wonderful when you can be best friends with your partner, but sometimes friendship is doing so well that it receives all focus, while in meantime romance (being in love) has been neglected. If you are not careful, in time, you will start looking at each other as close buddies and no longer be that passionate couple you started as. There are points that can guide you into detecting when your romance and desire is entering danger zone before it is too late and would be suggestible to seek professional advice on how to get things back on track.

Remembering not to forget our desires for our partner will keep romance in picture. If relationship still fails to rekindle those feelings and you or your partner cannot leave that buddy mode, looking around with curiosity for others, then your relationship will need some extra help (you can get advice on how to save your relationship). What if it is difficult to have a friendship? This can be another issue, but there are ways to help you find solutions. Some couples may share most wonderful romance and sex ever, but not really have an actual friendship. In most cases, it would not be advisable to stay in such a relationship, but there are ways you can try and still have some hope.

As long as you and your partner remember to keep romance, love and friendship balanced, your relationship will continue to live in great health, living as long as both of you wish it to! The decision is yours, so be good enough to yourself and your mate to make right one. Relationships can seem confusing and hopeless at times, and they can get that way if you do not keep close watch. Stop yourself periodically to check status of your relationship to makes sure bond is building, as it should be. Keep in mind that with right attention and teamwork, two of you can build greatest bond. Most importantly, remember that key word you just learned…BALANCE.

Alina Ruigrok is an independent relationship expert for http://www.love-sessions.com helping those in need of dating, love, relationship, marital, sexual and other personal advice through e-sessions.