Do you hold strong convictions about your values, such as integrity, peace, equality, honesty, and loyalty? The best way to demonstrate your convictions, to both yourself and others, is to exemplify your values when you experience tough times. It’s relatively easy to behave honestly when things are going smoothly-but much more difficult to be honest when you’re short of money and your bank makes a $1,000 error in your favor. What a wonderful opportunity to declare and experience your honesty!

In midst of your current tough time, remember these truths: - Life is eternal. - Much of tough in tough times stems from fear of what might result. - Most fears do not materialize. - Regardless of apparent severity of your current difficulty, to your soul this is simply a life experience, an illusion of reality for sake of experience. - There is opportunity within every difficult time-the chance to live as your highest self. Your behavior declares who you are. - Life’s experiences have no meaning other than meaning you attribute.

At time this article is being written, people are interested in landing on Mars. The gophers are pretty thick where I live right now and no one really knows why. Pick loose ended topics that people aren’t very emotional about.

This is an interview style familiar to you if you watch great interviewers on tv or hear them on radio. Top interviewers prepare their questions carefully ahead of time so it’s ok for you to do that, too. And pretty soon you can throw away notes!

Here's a list of questions you can ask any extrovert that they will probably enjoy answering.

(1)“What's new?”

It’s hard to realize that this is a legitimate way to start a conversation but it usually works if said with enthusiasm and expectation. Or you might try, “What’s new? I haven’t seen you for awhile …. prompting them to continue with raised eyebrows of expectation!”

(2) Let something on person catch your eye – this works especially well for intuitives (the ENs or Ins in personality typing) - and comment like this … “Where'd you get that [gorgeous leather purse][totally unique green hat][efficient looking daytimer][antique desk], [adorable Vintage costume]? It looks so cool!”

Say this with enthusiasm not earnestness. You don’t really want to know but you want someone to talk to you tonight! (2)Here’s another one … “Boy traffic was really something on way over here! Did you have trouble getting here on time, too?”

They can go either way with this and it may also lead to a discussion of cars, policemen, intersections, routes, way town is {growing][shrinking], etc. (3)If you’re at a meeting and I hope you’re at several of these a month as they’re easiest ways to meet people and network … “Great speaker, wasn't it? Do you like public speaking?” or “That guy was pretty interesting. Wonder who got him for speaker. Ever heard of him before?” or “What’d you think of speaker?” [can go either way]

Then just listen. Hopefully there will be some dramatic reaction or colorful stories you can enjoy hearing about. (4)“How about X’s [name a professional ball team] game last week? That was really something!”

This conversation can go either way. Remember to keep it to small talk, so mostly you want to keep person talking rather than really exchanging significant information or taking topic somewhere that it could get antagonistic. (5)Also at meeting … “This is a really nice [setting] [restaurant] [dining room] [campus] [car], isn't it?

Very interesting decor.” With any luck at all, they will have a strong opinion, some experience in other places that were [better][worse] and you can listen.

These are questions your extroverted associates should enjoy talking about. If you listen actively when they reply, you can get them to carry conversation for awhile as they warm to topic.

To extend conversations like this so you don’t have to go somewhere else and start all over, try peppering your listening with what are calling “flavoring” words and phrases. These are verbal cues for person to continue talking. They are said in an inviting tone of voice. We are inviting person to continue by showing interest.

“Really? Tell me more.” “Where’d you learn that?” “Where’d you hear that?” ”Where’d you find that out?” “Where can I find something like that?” “It must have taken a lot of time to find that out.” ”You’re really good at this, aren’t you?” Of course if person you’re talking to is an introvert, you’ll want to keep it short and move on since both of you dislike small talk.

Once we get idea of what small talk is, we can join in as well as everyone else. Remember general rule is to keep topic so “small” or open-ended that nobody feels left out or antagonized. Save your ”big” talk, your serious conversations, for your introverted honey back home in front of fire.