Don’t overbook OR overstay a good amount of time with relatives/friends. Sometimes a shorter stay works best and leaves you energy and space to get back to your own home and decompress.

Look for ways to give to or do for others. Feeling useful and appreciated will provide a great boost to your holiday spirits. Check into volunteer opportunities at local shelters and nursing homes or through any local church or non-profit group.

Don’t plan to spend entire holiday season with married /coupled family and friends. Seek out other singles and singles groups/ activities where you can feel relaxed and able to share with folks you have more in common with at this time. Better yet, plan a get together with other singles for one of holidays. A festive potluck meal, tree trimming party or other holiday event would probably be much appreciated.

Do avoid using food, alcohol or drugs to cope with holiday stress. Nothing is worse than feelings that follow use (or wrong use) of these things. This way of coping leads to depression, low self-esteem and a greater sense of isolation and despair.

Do decorate your home with any and all things that make it feel more festive and fun for YOU. Tune into all those wonderful traditions you grew up with. It does not have to be very costly or time consuming to begin your own traditions in your own place. Don’t put off or deny yourself those happy holiday expressions, as you wait for your significant other. Make your life all it can be right now.

Consider emphasizing more spiritual aspects of holiday. Go to a concert featuring religious holiday music or attend a church (or other) service, (even better with a friend).

Finally, going away to an exotic place may be just what you do need. Look into tour or vacation packages for singles. This may provide plenty of rest and relaxation and help you meet new friends and develop new interests.

Whatever you decide to do for your holidays, have fun and enjoy them. Focus on taking care of yourself and doing what is right for you. This way you will also be giving your best to those around you. Happy Holidays!

The holidays pressure every area of our life. Take a moment to think about what’s going on, and to organize yourself for coming holidays. Get some EQ coaching if you need help with getting organized, coping with holidays, managing family get-togethers, and so forth.

As I say in my ePamphlet, "How to Choose Perfect Christmas Gift for Her," this is a relationship skill that can be learned, and will benefit you in all areas of your life.

And why not make it your New Year’s resolution to take Don’t Disappoint Her Again™ EQ learning program.

Everyone needs to be good to themselves for holidays, number one priority, and men have a special burden of pressure this time of year – unless you learn how to be successful at it. You have choices.