Remember, such character repels, and is dangerous to your health.

Do I exercise self control? -- Galatians 5: 19, 20.

One who cannot control his temper is a dangerous person. He can be violent, and may even kill before realizing it. Would you like to marry and end up in jail for murder? -- Ephesians 4: 26.

Questions to ask of your prospective mate.

Lets say he is a male, although some of these questions may well apply to a female. What would you want of your male partner?

Does he have a good reputation? -- Philippines 2: 19: 22.

Yes, way a man is viewed by others, including those under his authority will enable you to know kind of reputation that he has. Unfortunately, most good women marry bad men. -- See 1 Samuel 25: 3, 23  25

Does he have good morals?

Find out if man you intend to marry is pretentious. Perhaps he wants to get you just to satisfy his sexual desires. Such persons think of themselves first. They do not even fear God.

Does he treat me kindly? -- Ephesians 5: 28, 29.

A kind husband would treat his wife in like manner. He trusts and praise his wife; he is not excessively jealous and is moderate in his expectations of her. Would that not be how you want your future husband to treat you?

Does he respect his family members?

Also find out how your prospective mate treats his parents and relatives. If he is rude to his family members, then you should expect trouble from him. But if he is respectful and obedient to his parents, then expect him to treat you lovingly after marriage.

Does he allow anger to control his life?

Many families have been ruined by violence. So if your prospective mate is given to fits of anger, that is a clear indication of danger. A woman who marries such a man will be subject to verbal and physical abuse. Do you call that marriage?

Does he have right goals?

Find out if your future mate has attainable or visionary life goals. For example, does he want to be a millionaire? Will it do him good? Or is it his goal to serve God?

So above questions will help you to scrutinize your mate in order for you to find out if such one has qualities that are needed to make a successful marriage. Try to look beyond wedding day. For you are going to live with this person all days of your life.

But now, how can you have a successful courtship?

(To be continued)

Copyright ) 2002, all rights reserved

About Author:

ARTHUR ZULU, is author of best - selling book, HOW TO WRITE A BEST-SELLER. Download your copy and FREE excerpt at : http://www.1stbooks.com/bookview/10975 The above article is taken from a book of same title, and book is for sale.For contacts, mailto : controversialwriter@yahoo.com

Parenthood

You may find out that love you had for your mate now begins to drop when children start coming in. The reason may be that you no longer have time for each other, or your mate is now getting old. Is it time to sue for divorce?

Deceit

It may vex you to find out that you are living with an infidel, a betrayal of trust, and not a friend and confidant. Now, suppose you find out that your mate lied to you about his or her history before marriage? Or what if you find that your mate was cheating on you -- committing adultery?

Sex

Suppose your partner starts depriving you of sex? Or what if sex, which was supposed for enjoyment now becomes mechanical? Some have even used sex as a bargain tool -- buy me a Swiss gold watch, and I will give you sex!

Some wives have woken up after wedding day to find out that their husbands were impotents, or eunuchs. Husbands have also been told by their wives that they would die if they had sex together. Because they have husbands who satisfy their sexual desires in spirit world! What would you call that?

Superstition

This may also affect your marriage depending on where you live. Barrenness, miscarriages, unseen attacks, deaths and broken marriages have been supposedly caused by wicked spirits. Does this bother you? Maybe not. But know that wicked spirits exist.

Inlaws

If you allow your inlaws to intrude into your family, they may ruin your marriage. Both of you are now one, and should be able to solve your marital problems without frequenting your parents, or relations for advice.

Friends

What kinds of associates do you and your mate have? Are they unwholesome friends? They will not help your marriage. Know that bad company can corrupt good manners.

These are some of things may shipwreck a marriage. They may not be case with your family. But know that there is no perfect family on this earth. So there must be one kind of problem or other in your family. Now what are required to make a marriage successful?

(To be continued)

Copyright ) 2002, all rights reserved

About Author:

ARTHUR ZULU, is author of best- selling book, HOW TO WRITE A BEST-SELLER. Download your copy and FREE excerpt at : http://www.1stbooks.com/bookview/10975 The above article is taken from a book of same title, and book is for sale. For contacts , mailto : controversialwriter@yahoo.com