What physical attributes do you love about yourself? I love natural white streaks that are starting to flow through and shine in my hair.

What emotional attributes do you love about yourself? I love that a book or a movie can be so moving, a child can be so loving and innocent, or a spectacular scene can be so breath taking that I'm moved to tears or laughter.

What spiritual attributes do you love about yourself? I love that I can ASK and I KNOW I will receive.

What creative attributes do you love about yourself? I love that I can turn a plot of ground into a beautiful garden of flowers or vegetables.

If there is something you don't like about yourself - step up and start doing something about it. Stop looking at yourself or thinking of your "bad" attributes. Focus on your "good". Stop dwelling on negative and only allow positive in and out. What we focus on multiplies: good or bad, negative or positive.

To quote Alan Cohen, "But because we are spiritual beings, it is inside world that determines our happiness. The most powerful way to improve your circumstances is by upgrading your consciousness. If you try to change your situation without changing your mind, sooner or later you will revert to your former position."

If there's something about you that CANNOT be changed, accept and love yourself for who you are.

I love me for me, and you need to love yourself, and give yourself positive attention before anyone else will or can. Love yourself unconditional.

I'm a firm believer that if you want someone to love you, you have to love yourself FIRST!

2. Do you give yourself positive attention, and put yourself first?

For next 31 days put yourself first; take time out for yourself. Give yourself positive attention you deserve. Meditate or pray. Take a walk on beach, around neighborhood, through your yard. Go fishing, to a game, or an event. Have a soak, or lie in grass. Curl up with a good book or watch your favorite movie. Get a new hair style, a manicure, pedicure, or massage (yes, men can do this too!)

3. Are you getting in your own way and blocking flow of love, intimacy, and attention by surrounding yourself with useless or unneeded stuff?

4. Are you "spinning your wheels" looking for stuff all day, moving stuff from one room or pile to next; too tired in evening or weekends to have a relationship?

Love yourself, and your surroundings, and rehabilitate yourself from your clutter.

Your possessions don't love you - they posses you!

Your possessions and stuff will not end your emotional lacking. Possessions, clutter, and all your "stuff" are just a temporary substitute to fill a void, calm you, or satisfy a desire or need, and most likely causing you MORE pain, chaos, and problems.

5. Has romance frizzled, gone dry, or disappeared from your life?

Make a list of all things that have changed in your love area. What's missing or lacking? What can you do to change this and how?

If you have a partner, please talk to them; maybe they are missing you too.

Find out what you need to do to get romance back into your lives. Make your list together.

Can you have a "standing" weekly or monthly date?

If you need a sitter, can you schedule in advance?

Will a romantic dinner, interlude, or just a walk, hand-in hand, satisfy what's missing?

Do you need a weekend or a week away, alone, together with no interruptions?

Do you just need an unexpected hug, a kiss, a wink, or an adult conversation?

Only you and your partner can discover, together, what is missing and how to bring back into your life what you need.

Whether you are single, dating, or whatever your situation, you need to discover by looking inside yourself what it is you need, what are you looking for, what will feed your Spirit and Soul.

Ask and ye shall receive, believe this, it will come to you.

For next 31 days, get "sober" from your clutter EVERYDAY by tossing or giving away stuff that is causing your clutter, and your pain. Remember that you are trying to replace your old habits and "addictions" with new and supportive ones. As like addict, who replaces getting high or going bar hopping, they attend AA meetings, and discover new ways to spend their time, so must you find out what you need to do and get to get sober from your clutter.

Arnold Patent said "If you ever feel that you should do something, lie down until feeling passes." Let's put a twist on this by saying, If you ever feel that you need to bring ANYMORE stuff into your life, lie down until feeling passes.

For additional help: The Organizing and Feng Shui Wizard, Janet L. Hall, FSII has a FREE newsletter, OverHall IT! at http://www.overhall.com/newsletter.htm and many organizational products for your office, home, and computer at http://www.overhall.com/products.htm Janet is a Professional Organizer, Certified Feng Shui Practitioner, Speaker, and Author and can help you regain control of your life, your time, your stuff, and your environment.

Copyright Ó 2001 by OverHall Consulting P.O. Box 263, Port Republic, MD 20676 All Rights Reserved. Permission is granted to reproduce, copy, or distribute so long as article is kept intact, this copyright notice and full information about contacting author is attached.

It's okay if you're not ready to de-clutter. Just as alcoholic and drug addict, no one can make them change, or make them stop their self-abuse. They have to have a deep desire to stop, to take control of their lives, to overcome and eliminate their negative behavior and take one day at a time making positive changes in their life, so must you in dealing with your clutter.

Get sober from clutter by taking it one day at a time or one area at a time. If you fall back into your old patterns, acknowledge fall and get back on wagon to being sober from clutter. Slowly, one day at a time.

Dali Lamas' Tips to Making Changes: So, how will you accomplish this? What will be your approach?

In book, The Art of Happiness, in which Dr. Cutler interviews Dali Lama about process of change, he indicates that they are six steps you need to do in order to bring about change: education, conviction, determination, action, and effort. "...you must exert effort to establish new habit patterns. This is way that inner change and transformation take place in all things, no matter what you are trying to accomplish."

The Dali Lama goes on to say, "...start by developing a strong willingness or wish to do it [what goal or action you are directing your efforts towards]. ...generate great enthusiasm. And, here, a sense of urgency is a key factor. ...It [sense of urgency] can give us tremendous energy. ...to generate commitment and enthusiasm to overcome negative behaviors or states of mind...is to be constantly aware of destructive effects of negative behavior. ...by making a steady effort, I think we can overcome any form of negative conditioning and make positive changes in our lives."

I know you can be stronger then your fear, your pain, or your sadness. You can be stronger then your habitual spending, hoarding, or saving by being determined, by carving out time, and by putting some effort into reasonable expectations of getting organized.

Just like alcoholic or drug addict, you are healing. Healing needs to take place in mind, body, and Spirit to be effective. A big step towards your healing will depend on you having knowledge of what you can do by yourself and acceptance of reality that you might need help.

God, grant me Serenity To accept things I cannot change... Courage to change things I can, And Wisdom to know difference.

Living one day at a time, Enjoying one moment at a time, Accepting hardship as pathway to peace. Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, Not as I would have it. Trusting that He will make all things right I surrender to His will. That I may be reasonably happy in this life, And supremely happy with Him forever in next. Amen. --Dr. Reinhold Niebuhr ~~~~~~~~~ For additional help: The Organizing and Feng Shui Wizard, Janet L. Hall, FSII has a FREE newsletter, OverHall IT! at http://www.overhall.com/newsletter.htm and many organizational products for your office, home, and computer at http://www.overhall.com/products.htm Janet is a Professional Organizer, Certified Feng Shui Practitioner, Speaker, and Author and can help you regain control of your life, your time, your stuff, and your environment.

Copyright Ó 2001 by OverHall Consulting P.O. Box 263, Port Republic, MD 20676 All Rights Reserved. Permission is granted to reproduce, copy, or distribute so long as article is kept intact, this copyright notice and full information about contacting author is attached.