That is how I feel about my disability. My conditions do not define me who I am. They some of many facets that make up Lynda Appell This is of course, true of anyone and every one who has a disability. Of course this goes for everyone in worldPeople with a disability for most part, do not want to seen as just their disability but as having abilities as well. After all people with disabilities are and should be seen as individuals and their disability should NOT be sole defining factor of anyone.

Instead of: “I HATE this time of year. I can’t wait until it’s over.” try “This is a difficult time of year for me. But it does give me an opportunity to become closer to my family and friends.”

Some people heal best by helping others. Try volunteering at an organization who help people with a greater need than yours. i.e. A soup kitchen, a homeless shelter, orphanages, etc. Often best therapy is helping others. Aside from obvious benefits of keeping your mind occupied and seeing that there are others in worse situations than yourself, charity work gives you a tremendous feeling of fulfillment. It can give you a renewed sense of purpose, so important during times of sadness.

Above all else, give yourself permission to enjoy yourself, to laugh, and to find peace. Each of these things are part of healing. Your life will never be same, but it will go on, and it can still be good. I want you to close your eyes for just a moment. Bring into room with you clearest image of person that you have lost. Now say “I love you and I miss you. You will always be in my heart. I need to know... is it okay for me to be happy again?”

Now, imagine answer that you receive. If you remember your loved one in their true light, I’m confident answer will be YES. Find peace over holidays, and be good to you.

Sources that may be helpful: http://www.nfda.org/resources/grief/1998/blues.html http://dying.about.com/library/weekly/aa120899c.htm http://cincinnati.com/holiday99/handling_grief.html http://dying.about.com/library/weekly/aa122299c.htm http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Woods/4671/holidays.html http://www.kirstimd.com/blues.htm