Lastly, I decided that it was time to try and start a business of my own. As I said, I did not want to work in an office, I really liked my freedom and my new found creativity that I hadn’t known existed (or hadn’t allowed to exist) before my latest revelation. I began by talking with friends who were entrepreneurial in spirit. Some took odd job/ handyman approach, some were contractors and one is even a published author! (You can visit her web site at address below, but be sure to come back and see me.) All were getting by and staying active in working world on their own terms. I looked into sales such as party goods and home decorations and found that I just wasn’t passionate about those items and that just wasn’t for me.

However, sometimes best things come out of blue and that’s what happened to me.

I was speaking with my mother about making rootbeer. She made it when we were kids, by actually digging root from a tree (or bush) . . . not sure. Well anyway, she couldn't remember what kind of root it was and I entered a search for root beer and stumbled onto Watkins Online. I was intrigued with products. When I realized it was a work-at-home opportunity, I was doubly surprised, since I had just recently decided to try and get something started.

As I dug deeper into Watkins story and company background, (bb reports, message boards, Winona local news, etc.), I realized that this looked like a solid company, with good community ties, good ethical background and management, and a great product line to boot!

Well, I got off track and never found answer to my rootbeer question, needless to say. But I’ve found a way to incorporate my desire to rekindle relationships, make new and lasting friendships and feel productive without taking time away from my family. These things are most important aspects of my life and I’m glad that I’ve been given opportunity to gain some insight into my own needs and actually do something about satisfying them. Hopefully, sharing my experience will help others to find out what exactly it is that they are missing in their lives and make some positive changes.

Pat Choinski is a 40 something baby boomer, married with two children, and lives in the Northeast. She's an independent distributor for Watkins products and looks forward to making her business a success.

4. Don’t confront him without 3 P’s – Proof, a Plan, and a Purpose.

Most experts agree that you should confront your husband about his cheating. But you need to have a plan. Choose time and place carefully so you can discuss affair at length without interruption. Do not ask your husband if he’s cheating. Cheaters lie. Present evidence you’ve gathered that proves he’s having an affair - names, dates, places, times, absences, phone calls, physical evidence, etc. Then ask him some pointed questions about his affair: why he did it, how it started, how long it’s been going on, how he feels about other woman, what he intends to do now that you know. Listen carefully to his answers so you can accurately assess situation. Then you’ll be able to make a wise decision about what course of action to take. Do not confront your husband without proof of his infidelity. To do so will be a colossal waste of time. Unless you can prove he’s been cheating, information-gathering phase will never get off ground. If you need proof, there’s a way for you to get it without hiring a detective or buying software or surveillance equipment. “Is He Cheating on You? - 829 Telltale Signs” will help you find all proof you need using only your eyes and ears, your personal knowledge of your husband, and information in this book.

5. Don’t waste your time and energy on other woman.

One of worst things you can do is become obsessed with other woman. It’s natural for you to be curious about her, but she’s not worth your time and energy. Repeatedly questioning your husband about her, referring to her or dragging her name into conversation puts spotlight on her instead of on real issues where it belongs. Don’t obsess over details of what happened between two them. Concentrate on working things out between two of you. Do not humiliate or frustrate yourself by calling or confronting other woman and demanding that she leave your husband alone. She’s not obligated to take orders from you. Harassing her or threatening her will put you on wrong side of law. Name-calling, criticizing or belittling her will only make your husband come to her defense. You’ll be driving them closer together instead of forcing them apart Forget about other woman and focus your energy and efforts on getting your marriage back on track.

Will you end up sabotaging your marriage or saving it? The final outcome depends on way you handle things when you first discover your husband’s affair. In initial stages, you may be unsure exactly what you’re going to do. But at least you know what NOT to do. Whether you stay with your husband or leave him, avoiding these mistakes, leaves way clear for whatever decision you eventually make.

Copyright 2003 Ruth Houston