Self Help: Improve Your Listening Immediately!

Improve Your Listening Immediately!

Written by Stephen D. Boyd

Continued from page 1
Streamline! Fourth, eliminate clutter around repparttar

phone and your desk so you won’t easily be distracted when you are talking by phone or have a person talking to you in your office. Notes, pens, folders, clocks, and knickknacks can distract you, and you may not even be aware of repparttar 130009

distraction until you realize you have no idea what repparttar 130010

person just said. Choose your time! Fifth, when possible choose your listening time during repparttar 130011

part of

day when you are mentally alert. If you are a morning person make your most important appointments, interviews, or phone calls during that time. If mornings are difficult for you, make afternoon calls. You lose listening acumen when you are tired physically or mentally. Admit! Finally, don’t be afraid to admit that you’re having a hard time listening and make necessary adjustments. You might say, “I’m sorry I missed that last point. Please repeat that for me.” Or “I’m having a hard time concentrating; let me move to another chair.” Or “Could we pick up repparttar 130013

conversation at a later time this afternoon? I need a break and some lunch.” Any of these responses will tell people that you want to listen to their messages, and that what they have to say is important to you. Some listening skills, such as suspending judgment, dealing with biases, and avoiding daydreaming, take time to develop because of repparttar 130014

mental self-discipline they require. Following these tips, however, will improve your listening immediately.

Stephen D. Boyd, Ph.D., CSP, is a professor of speech communication at Northern Kentucky University in Highland Heights, Kentucky. He is also a trainer in communication who presents more than 60 seminars and workshops a year to corporations and associations. See additional articles and resources at http://www.sboyd.com. He can be reached at 800-727-6520 or at info@sboyd.com.

Dealing with Difficult People: the Prima Donna (or Heir Apparent)

Written by Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach

Continued from page 1

2. UNDERSTAND THEIR MOTIVES.

Yes, they're after attention, adulation, etc., but repparttar key is - at repparttar 130007 expense of what. If they're running rough-shod over team-mates, customers, or you, it's not going to work. If they're performing well and being respectful ENOUGH of your people, policies and procedures, find out what makes them smile (raise, percs, time off) and give them more of it.

3. DETERMINE THEIR CHARACTER.

Some people manage some annoying personality traits (such as arrogance and perfectionism) without being unethical or abusive. They may 'present' and 'talk' more than they act out. The thing to test for is do they consider themselves (1) indispensable or (2) above repparttar 130008 law. No one is either, and if you harbor one in repparttar 130009 fold, it will turn out to be a wolf in sheep's clothing and you will have no one to blame but yourself.

4. DETERMINE YOUR ABLIITY TO DEAL WITH THE STAR.

Some can, some can't. You have to have a lot of EQ to deal with repparttar 130010 heir apparent. 5. BE DIRECT AND IMMEDIATE.

The heir apparent tends to continually be planning a coup d'etat. When you catch wind of it - and your nose for catching repparttar 130011 wind had best be sharp - call him in, confront him, tell him to stop in no uncertain terms, and then monitor. Calling them on it immediately is crucial. They don't back off to subtleties.

6. GIVE THEM A HOME RUN PITCH.

Consider confining them to a singular role. If you have repparttar 130012 kind of situation where you can put them on a lone project, do so. They like to hit home runs, and may well score one for you.

7. CAN THEY EVER FUNCTION AS PART OF A TEAM?

Let them answer that question for you. Immerse them in team work and meetings. If you're not sure they can be part of repparttar 130013 gang, give them more of repparttar 130014 gang to deal with. They will sink or swim. You're providing repparttar 130015 water for repparttar 130016 experiment.

8. GIVE OTHER 'TESTS'.

All repparttar 130017 things you've heard about prima donnas, you can go ahead and test out. Ask them to do what everyone else has to do, and see how they function. Are they willing to get into repparttar 130018 trenches? Make coffee? Stay late? (Use your own EQ, and do this with respect. You accomplish nothing if you're a prima donna too, and don't treat people with respect.)

The aggressive ones you'll ferret out right away. It's repparttar 130019 passive-aggressive ones whose nonverbal communication you'll have to be able to read.

9. THEY AREN'T SUBTLE. THROW OUT THE GAUNTLET.

In other words, draw repparttar 130020 line. If they're repparttar 130021 kind that has to step over it, better to find out sooner than later.

10. GET PROACTIVE.

They will want to perform on their own terms. YOU dictate what that means within your relationship or organization.

Managed right and accommodated to just enough, they'll bring you money, clients, fame and fortune. Well, okay, they'll do a great job for you. They're special after all!

©Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . Coaching, business programs, Internet classes, teleclasses and ebooks around Emotional Intelligence. I train and certify EQ coaches. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for information on this fast, affordable, flexible, no-residency program. For FREE ezine, email me and put “ezine” for subject line. Check out THE BEST EBOOK LIBRARY ON THE INTERNET - www.webstrategies.cc/ebooklibrary.html .

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