Does It Matter What You Wear?

Written by Susan Dunn, MA, Personal and Professional Development Coach


Continued from page 1

If you’re female, ask that coach about jewelry. I was so grateful torepparttar mentor who told me when I attended my first XX conference thatrepparttar 101681 women in that profession in that town would be “draped in jewelry, rings, bracelets, necklaces earrings, toe rings, naval rings …” Of course I would like to knowrepparttar 101682 opposite, too. Why? Well, it’s not cool to sit down to a business dinner in Seattle and ask for iced tea. If you know what I mean. Oh, you haven’t done that? Let me tell you what happens. Everyone’s head jerks toward you. Then they look away. The waiter stammers and shifts from foot to foot. You realize immediately there is no iced tea in this town. Butrepparttar 101683 waiter won’t let it go. “I’ll brew some tea,” he says, “and bring you a glass of ice.” “Or just shoot me,” I’m thinking. Then he adds, “Is that what iced tea is like?” Everyone is still looking atrepparttar 101684 ceiling.

ASK THE COACH

Your answers are only as good as your questions. Here’s a good question to ask that coach: “What will I wish I’d brought with me that I won’t think of.” That will triggerrepparttar 101685 “tourist” mindset in your resource person. Ohrepparttar 101686 things I’ve wished I’d brought. ·A well broken in pair of sandals for my Caribbean cruise ·A bathing suit for my December trip to Chicago. Of courserepparttar 101687 hotel had a hot tub. They all do. ·A pair of comfortable heels each time I’ve given a presentation. Why do I fool myself? ·Slacks with elastic waistline for cruises ·Something Tencel for long trips ·The black Pashmina shawl that works with everything. Why do I leave it inrepparttar 101688 back of my closet? ·Something forrepparttar 101689 rain. It rains when you go somewhere else. You can go torepparttar 101690 dollar store and buy what amounts to disposable ponchos and head covers. (Great for touring Russia inrepparttar 101691 summer or Seattle nearly any time). ·Something really cute for vacations. You think you want to go funky, but then you see someone in a smashing linen matching outfit, and there you are, buying something cute inrepparttar 101692 hotel store with a price tag that isn’t cute at all. ·An evening bag. With an evening bag you can get by with that same black Tencel skirt … you know what I mean. ·Jeans. Dry cleaned and starched. ·Sensible shoes. Oh was I mad when they wouldn’t let me rent a motorbike on Grand Cayman with my thong sandals, andrepparttar 101693 heels back in my room wouldn’t have maderepparttar 101694 cut either. ·That thing that’s hanging onrepparttar 101695 back of your chair if you’re in an office right now. You know what I mean. Bring it along for when you get cold which could be anywhere, any time. Find out what you need to know and masterrepparttar 101696 fundamentals so you don’t have to think about what you’ve got on!

©Susan Dunn, MA, The EQ Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . Coaching, distance learning, and ebooks around emotional intelligence for your continued personal and professional development. I train and certify EQ coaches. Get in this field, dubbed “white hot” by the press, now, before it’s crowded, and offer your clients something of real value. Start tomorrow, no residence requirement. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for free ezine.


Key to Excellent Communication: Anticipation

Written by Susan Dunn, MA Clinical Psychology


Continued from page 1

However, I’ve thought of this communication many times as I’ve given people instructions in how to do things and tried to get inside their head to figure out how best to conveyrepparttar information. It’s come in very handy. Ifrepparttar 101680 person doesn’t get an “ah hah” atrepparttar 101681 moment, they tell you about it when they get back, and they are grateful, as I was.

Here are some examples that direct you to manage feelings, think it through, and respond, not react.

1.When someone says in a negotiation, “Your fees are way out of line,” resist all urges to get defensive.

2. When you’re telling a teenager something they need to do, resist all urges to get drawn into arguments over premises.

3.When you’re “hijacked” (flooded with anger) resist all urges to sayrepparttar 101682 first thing that comes into your mind. Stop and count to ten or take a timeout and come back to it.

4. When you’re giving an event and it starts to unravel atrepparttar 101683 end, resist all urges to give up.

5.Whenever you’re trying to solve a problem, resist all urges to think black and white. Most ofrepparttar 101684 time there is more than one possible solution.

6.If you seerepparttar 101685 devil with a blue dress on … j.k.

These suggestions pointrepparttar 101686 listener toward things likely to occur, in some cases almost certain to occur, and alerts them to feelings they should note but hold at bay in order to allow for correct action, sound judgment and wise decisions.

To putrepparttar 101687 icing onrepparttar 101688 cake, you can go on torepparttar 101689 “And if” portion of instructions. Inrepparttar 101690 first example, if I missedrepparttar 101691 turn, nothing happened except I’d get lost.

Another day I was heading into what’s called The Loop,repparttar 101692 major business district of Chicago, where he worked. Chicago has great public transportation and most people takerepparttar 101693 elevated train intorepparttar 101694 City (the “el”). I would catchrepparttar 101695 el just two blocks from our house and take it torepparttar 101696 Loop. “Then,” he said, “leaverepparttar 101697 station and turn right. If you turn left you will be in Skid Row and you don’t want to be there.”

“What’s that?” I asked, instantly curious.

He was not referring torepparttar 101698 band. What he was referring to was largely removed in Chicago with urban renewal, butrepparttar 101699 USC site defines Los Angeles’ Skid Row as “an extensive cluster of missions, shelters, drop-ins and Single Room Occupancy (SRO) hotels,repparttar 101700 largest service-dependent ghetto inrepparttar 101701 nation.”

My father described it somewhat differently, and did not fail to make an impression on me.

I turned right.

This is akin to those helpful people who tell you in giving driving directions, “And if you get to a Jack-in-the-Box, you’ve gone too far.”

It’s always good communication to anticipate some of these things.

©Susan Dunn, MA, The EQ Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . Coaching, distance learning and ebooks around emotional intelligence for your personal and professional development. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for free ezine. For daily EQ Tips, send blank email to EQ4U-subscribe@yahoogroups.com . For EQ coach training and certification, go here: http://www.eqcoach.net .




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