The aggressiveness that turns off prospects sets in when you assume, every time you pick up phone, that you have a solution for them.

Your tone of voice and language gives them that message long before they've even had a chance to agree that they have a problem you might be able to help them solve.

But if you can manage to find that middle ground of not assuming anything while also communicating in a low-key, unassuming manner, you'll discover a whole new effectiveness you could never have imagined.

Can prospects sense when you're assuming too much?

Sure they can -- because most of us have been conditioned to present or talk about our solution as a way to engage prospects so they'll reveal their problems to us.

But that logic is completely flawed, because when you launch into your solution to someone who doesn't trust you yet, all you do is allow them to pigeonhole you as a stereotyped "salesperson."

So how do you make this concept of being unassuming but effective a reality?

First, learn to start conversations by focusing 100 percent on generating discussions around prospects' problems, rather than pitching your solution second you hear an opening.

Second, learn to begin those conversations by converting benefits of your solution into problems that your solution can solve.

Third, after you and your prospects have identified a problem or problems, you can then engage in a discussion about whether fixing those problems is a priority.

It's only at that point that prospects have finally given you implicit permission to share your solution with them.

Jumping in with solutions prematurely will only land you back in trap of being perceived as "aggressive."

With a Masters Degree in Instructional Design and over a decade of experience creating breakthrough sales strategies for global companies such as UPS and QUALCOMM, Ari Galper discovered the missing link that people who sell have been seeking for years.

Despite this bounty of benefits, you might still be hesitant to dive into Internet shopping. Don't be embarrassed. You have good reason to take your time and weigh your choices. According to U.S. Federal Trade Commission, Internet fraud tops list of thousands of fraud cases that happen every year. In some ways, WWW could stand for Wild West Web, in that anything goes. Vendors can be villains in disguise, and there aren't any online Wyatt Earps to protect you from these bad guys. You're on your own.

But give yourself some credit. You have common sense it takes to survive WWW. It is same commonsense that helps you make most of your money on your standard shopping trips. Become familiar and comfortable with an online vendor before jumping into a purchase. Ask questions and do a bit of research.

After doing your research, you'll feel more confident in searching for your online booty. To refine your findings and whittle your list to only exceptional sites, look for these additional qualities:

•A focus on local shopping, so you can feel more confident buying from neighbors. •Free education and advice on safe purchasing. •No-cost and easy browsing through available merchandise. •Search tools that let you prioritize items by category, location, and distance. •A straightforward pricing system that avoids haggling and risk of auction bidding. •Quick price comparisons among different vendors.

Unbelievably, a few trustworthy, practical, and exciting Web sites exist that have all of these features. To find these websites, simply browse through Yahoo's directory under classifieds category. The best of online classified sites offer these services free to buyers such as you. Some of these sites can link you at no charge to your neighbor selling antique lamp that you've been hunting for or that retiree looking to unload an incredible piece of real estate-or cowboy looking to sell his big-screen television.