4. Find out what their fears are. Don't assume you know what your children are thinking. Children often personalize fears, and may be afraid their school will be bombed or that any airplane might fly into a building.

5. Consider age. You will talk differently to a four-year-old than a ten-year-old.

6. Limit television, radio, and newspaper exposure. Children simply don't need to hear about war all time. I don't think adults should be exposed to this constant barrage! Make sure that your child's exposure to graphic coverage is very limited.

7. Tell your child what you think. Do you support war? Are you opposed to war? Use this as an opportunity to share your values in an age-appropriate way.

8. Avoid generalizations and racist statements! Casual comments about "those Arabs" or "those Muslims," even in jest, will be noted by your child. The current conflict is a perfect opportunity to talk about how there are good and bad people of every race and religion. Keep in mind song from South Pacific:

You have to be taught Before it's too late. Before you are six or seven or eight to hate all people your relatives hate. You have to be carefully taught.

If we teach our children by example that it's OK to hate all Muslims or all Iraquis, how are we better than Taliban or Al-Quaida?

9. Distinguish between patriotism and political opinion. The true American tradition is freedom of political expression. Feel free to tell children that you disagree with some people, but emphasize their right to have their own opinion.

10. If you have a relative in battle, or a family friend deployed in Iraq, situation is much more difficult. Everyone, adults and children, will be anxious and troubled. You won't be able to help it. Marshall your own fears with spiritual support from your religion, from relatives, from friends. Focus on fact that your loved one is far more likely to return than to be killed or injured. Be extra careful not to have TV on all time, no matter how compelling it might seem. Reassure your children that Uncle Bob will be fine. Statistically, this is probably true -- and it does not help children to imagine worst. Take action together - send an email through www.emailourmilitary.com or through appropriate service branch, make a poster, tie a yellow ribbon, plan loved one's return party.

Children today are subjected to influences that cause them to be unnecessarily fearful and anxious. A major source of this is television. TV coverage of war, terrorism, and violent crime are things we need to protect our children from if they are to have a chance to be children. Kids don't need to shoulder adult burdens.

The Rev. John Jackman, an ordained minister, is Executive Director of Comenius Foundation, an independent nonprofit that advocates for responsible television. Comenius Foundation sponsors a free web site, www.changingchannels.org, with more information about how you can limit negative effects of television on your children.

Free reprint rights are granted for use of this article in web sites, e-zines, newspapers, magazines, and newsletters provided above credit is included complete with web site URL. Please notify us of your use of article by emailing us at info@changingchannels.org.