Forty-five minutes later, smoking decision is made, and it's back to business.

You calculate what your time is worth for an hour and decide that you've just spent $75 worth listening to Great Smoking Debate and $25 observing Musical Chairs.

Madam Chairperson, clearly flustered by events thus far, launches into an introduction of New Business.

New Business, it turns out, includes agenda items that have been submitted by invitees. Obviously, some squealed, "Carpe Diem" and "seized opportunity" to brag about their company's accomplishments. All under guise of Keeping Industry Informed, of course.

"By what strange twist of fate did Madam Chairperson deem these items appropriate," you wonder tiredly. An hour later, New Business winds down. You have now spent $200 worth of time and no end in site.

Next follows Refreshment Break, during which Solitaire Guy disappears, never to return. Lucky devil, either he's somebody's brother-in-law or he's planning on retiring next month, you decide.

The meeting re-assembles amid rumbles of dissention. People have to leave. The parking meter is running out. They have other appointments to attend.

"But," says Madam Chairperson, "We have not yet discussed our main agenda item. We must reschedule."

Instantly, like soldiers ready for battle, a line of PDA's and appointment books appear on conference table. Papers shuffle, electronic devises hum. A second meeting date is set.

"Your Minutes will arrive by email tomorrow," calls Recorder. "Let me know if there are corrections. We’ll see you again next week."

And thus eternal cycle continues.

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