I had lunch with a dear friend other day. While I enjoyed company and food, I left feeling a little depressed.
When I thought about it, I realized my friend was brilliant at dismissing every book, concept, guru, self-help method, or healing approach he had read or heard about.
He was not directly negative or purposely critical. He sincerely wanted something that would work in his life. But he was unconsciously dismissing everything that came his way.
At one point I told him about a guru I had studied over two decades ago. I told him that people said, "My guru was obviously enlightened. He radiated it."
My friend cut in saying, "I'm sure there are people who saw that guru and didn't think he was any smarter than a paper bag."
Well, my friend is right.
But my friend is also unhappy.
I think there's a lesson here. When we dismiss people and ideas because entire world doesn't agree with them, we get to be right. But we also get to stay empty inside. By dismissing what could work, we dismiss our own growth. We dismiss what's possible.
It doesn't matter if book you read and love is loved by anyone else. It doesn't matter if teacher you admire is admired by anyone else. It doesn't matter if healing method that worked for you doesn't work for everyone.
What matters is you. Your happiness. Your health. Your healing. Your well-being.
Truth is, no method works for everyone. No teacher is right for everyone. No book is going to inspire everyone.
It all comes from within. You are first and final authority on your life.
Rather than dismissing what is possible so you can be right, what can you accept so you can grow?
Dismissing is often a way to deflect messages. It's a self-defense mechanism. If you dismiss book, idea, or method offered to you, you get to be right --- and stay right where you're at.
Every successful person I know has accepted new tools into their lives over years, spent thousands of dollars on personal growth and self-study, and never regretted any of it.
The key is not dismissing, but digesting.
For example, Nerissa and I had dinner with friends recently. One friend was complaining about her job. >From her perspective, there was no way out of misery she felt at her place of work. Bad boss. Bad hours. Bad pay. You name it, it was bad.