Writing Fiction to Get Rich

Written by Michael LaRocca

WRITING FICTION TO GET RICH Copyright 2004, Michael LaRocca

Some of us write simply because we can't not write. Ideas grab us, move us, and demand to be written. We strive to make it as real as we possibly can, to improve at our craft every day, hopefully to make it intorepparttar realm of literature as well as entertainment. We want to craft an entire world whererepparttar 118207 places and people are so real thatrepparttar 118208 reader doesn't feel like he's reading a book as much as he is going to another place. Inrepparttar 118209 lofty world of literature that we strive for,repparttar 118210 reader will still think aboutrepparttar 118211 book after reading that last page. It's our gift torepparttar 118212 reader, something to take with him. Given sufficient skill, this can even happen long after we are dead.

Then we learn that doesn't sell. Oh, there are exceptions. Some novelists make a living by consistently writing quality literature. But, there are quite a few best sellers who have no such goals. They write for money, and they make it.

Evenrepparttar 118213 writer who has written great literature has trouble marketing it that way. We have to look at our "target audience." Who will buy this book? Let me see, our heroine survived spousal abuse, so there's an audience. There's a suicide, so we can getrepparttar 118214 bereavement crowd. Where'srepparttar 118215 setting? We can get a local audience. The hero's a cop. Mayberepparttar 118216 teen boys will go for that. Nah, too light on action. But there's a romance. Maybe we'll market torepparttar 118217 romance readers. Giverepparttar 118218 hero bedroom eyes and pass him off as a romantic hero. Yeah, that might work.

But if you want to write to get rich, even that's not enough. Nah,repparttar 118219 time to think about your reader is before you writerepparttar 118220 book, not after.

Throw in lots of gratuitous sex, preferably extramarital. One (and only one) character who flirts and is sorely tempted and walks away from "love" to remain true to his wife.

Use taboo words for shock value. Ram, hump, scream, oral sex, voluptuous, female orgasm (the great revelation). Make sure a lot of your leads enjoy sex. Horny women are a good way to pull inrepparttar 118221 readers you want. We all know men are horny, but most of your readers haven't discovered that some women enjoy sex too. Tell them this. Giverepparttar 118222 female readers a balm for their consciences andrepparttar 118223 male readers someone to dream about.

The Litter Box Shuffle

Written by M.L. Scott

Cat owners have a preoccupation with waste disposal that rivals only that of sanitation workers. Indeed, only a fellow cat lover could understand. The ultimate litter solution seems to elude us likerepparttar search forrepparttar 118206 Holy Grail. We know it's out there. And we know it should cost something less than a mortgage payment. Like Pavlovian subjects, our ears prick to attention and our wallets fly open atrepparttar 118207 mere hint of an easy and odorless answer. The irony of this fixation lies inrepparttar 118208 fact that of all animal species, cats have a preeminent position as being amongrepparttar 118209 cleanest. How many pets do their business and then spend an equal amount of time covering their tracks? Even people forget to flush. Hand a cat a roll of toilet paper and it would probably ask for a moist towelette. For their owners however, going one on one with a toilet bowl and brush seems to offer less chance of fecal matter contact thanrepparttar 118210 litter box shuffle. Whether we rake it, scoop it or crystallize it, we still feel incomplete. A little wistful, perhaps, as we eye Fido bound into a litter free abode after his morning sprint. For every hour spent takingrepparttar 118211 dog for a walk, there are four engaged in litter shopping, hauling litter in and out ofrepparttar 118212 car, pouring it intorepparttar 118213 box, scooping clumps, smoothing it out, splatter management (don't ask) and carpet treatments for wayward torpedoes and seeping ooze. (Again, don't ask). Not to mentionrepparttar 118214 incalculable cost of passing out fromrepparttar 118215 ammonia fumes of an overdue litter box. Rousing from a toxic coma with a pooper-scooper in your hand and fecal waste down your pants does something to your self-esteem years of therapy can't erase. Before many cat owners even contemplate how to handlerepparttar 118216 waste, they lose themselves in contemplation ofrepparttar 118217 perfect litter box. Cat owners are faced with options that vary from motorized trays complete with motion detectors that purport to automaterepparttar 118218 process of separatingrepparttar 118219 fecal clumps fromrepparttar 118220 unused litter without manglingrepparttar 118221 cat to sifting litter boxes that allow you to shake, rattle and rollrepparttar 118222 waste into a neat little package. However, evenrepparttar 118223 perfect box won't getrepparttar 118224 waste fromrepparttar 118225 receptacle torepparttar 118226 local landfill without that human touch. And that's where things really start to get messy. Who knew that emptyingrepparttar 118227 litter box could be a lesson inrepparttar 118228 chemical break down of amino acids? The interesting thing about kibble is that though it starts out as a solid with a sizzling bacon aroma, it ends up a semi liquid reeking of rank sulfur. And it sticks to everything. Everything. So whether your box sorts and separates likerepparttar 118229 postal office or rocks like Elvis Presley,repparttar 118230 icky sticky bits make for litter box hell.

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