I know, I know, this is gonna arouse a little controversy, especially from some of you women out there. And ladies, please don’t take this wrong way - I still love ya‘ll as much as ever, but I have to tell it like it is. Bottom line, gift giving holidays are geared towards women receiving majority of gifts. It’s as simple as that.

Ya’ll should know me well enough by now to know that I’m not going to say something like that without being able to back it up. It’s my responsibility as a serious journalist to support my statements with facts. So, in that spirit, here’s a list of six major gift giving holidays along with where all those gifts seem to be going:

1. Valentine’s Day - Is there any couple alive who can honestly say on Valentine’s Day that more money was spent on man than woman? If there’s a couple like that out there, please write me, cause your story would make a full length column in and of itself. We all know, just by what is put on sale on Valentine’s Day, that this holiday is slanted towards women. If you don’t believe me, kindly tell me many men out there are longing for gifts like flowers, balloons, heart shaped boxes of candy, or edible underwear? Hmmm?

$$$ Advantage: Women.

2. Anniversaries - This is a slam dunk for women. Anniversaries exist solely to pay homage to female in relationship. Most times, she gets expensive jewelry, nice clothing items, trips, cars, etc., etc. What does man typically receive? Usually either a mailbox, some work clothes, or a gift certificate to a store that doesn’t exactly sell male oriented items (Victoria’s Secret, for example). In fact, to no man’s surprise, this certificate usually ends up being redeemed for items that benefit woman.

$$$ Advantage: Women.

On Spring Equinox 2004, my ex-husband (yes, that's right! my ex-husband!) Larry and I remarried. We had been together for almost seventeen years, and had divorced several years ago when our relationship problems seemed impossible to resolve. But we still loved each other, so we figured out what to do to make things better, and are now happier than ever.

In planning our wedding, we wanted to keep it simple, small, and full of meaning. We wanted a ceremony and celebration that would be easy to prepare for and manage. We wanted an intimate occasion, surrounded by our closest friends who would participate with us in intention of our union. And as we planned our wedding, we used same guidelines for health and environment that we practice in our daily home life.

Since most books and articles are about planning big weddings, I want to offer some tips on planning another sort of wedding that can be beautiful and meaningful in it's own way.

* Make it your day. Each wedding can and should be a unique expression of couple getting married. So create day just way you want it, to please two of you.