Without Country

Written by Terry Dashner

Without Country

Terry Dashner

“’If you are ever tempted to say a word or to do a thing that shall put a bar between you and your family, your home, and your country, pray God in his mercy to take you that instant home to his own heaven. Stick by your family, boy; forget you have a self—while you do everything for them. Think of your home, boy; write and send, and talk about it. Let it be nearer and nearer to your thought,repparttar farther you have to travel from it and rush back to it, when you are free…’

“‘And for your country, boy,’ andrepparttar 125864 words rattled in his throat, ‘and forrepparttar 125865 flag,’ and he pointed torepparttar 125866 ship, ’never dream a dream but of serving her as she bids you, thoughrepparttar 125867 service carry you through a thousand hells. No matter what happens to you, no matter who flatters you or who abuses you, never look at another flag, never let a night pass but you pray God to bless that flag. Remember, boy, that behind all these men you have to do with, behind officers, and government, and people even, there isrepparttar 125868 Country Herself, your Country, and that you belong to Her as you belong to your own mother. Stand by Her, boy, as you would stand by your mother…’”

His name was Philip Nolan. Inrepparttar 125869 early 1800’s, Nolan, in a fit of anger, told a military court that he never wanted to hear ofrepparttar 125870 United States again. Nolan was sentenced to have his wish fulfilled. He was to spendrepparttar 125871 rest of his life at sea, never to touch an American port and never to be given any news aboutrepparttar 125872 United States. Asrepparttar 125873 years passed, he lived to regret deeply his rash statement and to long for any reminder of his home, his family, his native land. He died aboard ship fifty years later, and in all those years he heardrepparttar 125874 name ofrepparttar 125875 United States only once.


Written by Kenn Gividen

HOW TO DATE ANN COULTER (IF YOU MUST) by Kenn Gividen KennGividen@WritersBureau.org

I’ve decided to go public with my intentions: I will not be asking Ann Coulter for a date. There are some good reasons.

First, I’m married. Second, there is a substantial age differential. And, third, I fear rejection.

While reading Coulter’s book, How to Talk to Liberals (If You Must), I thought aboutrepparttar prospects.

A single, middle-aged guy who’s still trying to look like he’s in his 20s would make a perfect match. But before you pick uprepparttar 125863 phone to poprepparttar 125864 question, there are some things you need to know.

Keep in mind, for example, that Ann Coulter is relatively good looking. “Relative to what?” you ask. “A ’58 Buick? Tapioca? Phyllis Schlafly?"


You’ll also want to know that Coulter was born and raised inrepparttar 125865 Bubba Belt. That’s important. Not because she’s Ann Coulter, but because it’s a date. Any guy who’s openedrepparttar 125866 door for feminist, been called a chauvinist and then jabbed with an upper right (knee) knows all about this. Coulter is no feminist. You will openrepparttar 125867 door for her. And if you don’t, you may get jabbed with an upper right.

And that brings me to another announcement. Thursday, April 1, allrepparttar 125868 women ofrepparttar 125869 world are to meet in my living room. If you are a feminist, you will be tattooed with an X on your forehead. If you are not a feminist, you will be marked with an O. That will end door-opening offenses for women and considerable pain for men.

Back to our date with Coulter.

You will pick her up at her stylish Washington, D.C. apartment, say, 5ish. When you first seerepparttar 125870 flow of long blond hair coveringrepparttar 125871 left-side of her face, you may want to raise your eyebrows twice. That’s body language. It means “hubba-hubba” in Bubbaland. However,repparttar 125872 significance ofrepparttar 125873 left-face covering should not be noticed. Just gaze into her gorgeous right eyeball.

The preferred date forrepparttar 125874 evening will berepparttar 125875 NBA game. The Indiana Pacers will be playingrepparttar 125876 Detroit Bullets-oops-Pistons. Granted, it’s an unlikely event in Washington, but this is an imaginary date. Don’t get excited.

Small talk in route torepparttar 125877 event will be in order. You will notice Coulter loves words that no one can use or understand, except for her and William F. Buckley, Jr. The most common is “felonious.” Accordingrepparttar 125878 dictionary.com,repparttar 125879 word is defined as “adj., relating to anyone Ann Coulter finds disagreeable.”

It also works well in titles. There was Alexanderrepparttar 125880 Great, Richardrepparttar 125881 Lionhearted and, accordingrepparttar 125882 Coulter, Bill Clintonrepparttar 125883 Felonious Liar.

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