An introduction to
weight loss mentalityBy: The Icon Diet Reader
After a particularly grueling workout I find myself sitting in steam room taking stock of my aching body. I spent last hour of my life breaking down my muscle fibers, forcing them to rebuild. I spent last hour of my life sweating my way through a few hundred gut wrenching ab exercises. My shoulders, pecs and triceps are warm and slightly numb with fatigue. My abs are a whole zone of dull ache. Not only does my body ache but my ego has been busied as well. I am by no means like most of hard bodies I see at gym. They float into gym wearing several hundred dollars worth of high fashion fitness gear. Most of people at my gym start to look better as they sweat. To me, it looks like they come to gym to show off temple of their bodies. Each and every movement they make is a declaration of pride.
They come to gym to maintain. I come to gym to renovate. I don't look glamorous when I sweat. With every successive exercise I do, my face becomes more flushed and I look every more maniacal. My baggy old work out clothes - last summers painting shorts and a ratty tee- become plastered to my body. My body may be a temple now, but in a past life it was a condemned building facing a wrecking ball.
I Lean my head back and take a deep breath. Why am I here? Why am I doing this? Of course by time I exhale, answer is clear in my mind.
Up until a year and a half ago I worked in an office, buried from world behind a computer. I sat in same ergonomic chair for most of my forty hour work week. The chair is a point of interest because it is designed by highly educated people to make act of sitting for long periods more comfortable. It’s as though they know that I spend my life stuck in a chair and by making it comfortable, I will be blind to it. My chair, in my office. I drank my pop there, ate my junk food there and I put on about thirty pounds there.
While not a huge amount of weight to gain, thirty pounds came on top of an already out of shape body. Realistically speaking, a year and a half ago, I was at least forty pounds overweight.
I only really became aware of it when I noticed myself in a wedding photo. I looked like a man who was carrying an extra forty pounds. I looked like hell.
Denial is a wonderful thing. When I first became aware that I no longer had boyish figure I once had, I simply ignored it. I told myself that changes were only minor and not really that noticeable.
Denial is only a temporarily wonderful thing. Six months later, I went to buy jeans for myself and discovered that my waist had grown by about four inches. My initial reaction was that clothing line had changed their sizing practice. But after hitting a few different shops, it was clear that there was no size conspiracy; my waist had grown. It was only by grace of modern technology and miracle of stretch fabrics that my current pants still fit me. I was embarrassed. I felt shameful. I felt awful. I ate a pizza.
When I got up I decided that I wanted to feel better about myself. I wanted to be leaner and fitter. I wanted to look like an underwear model, tight tank top synched across a bulging set of abs, leg muscles carved up into well defined portions of muscular geography. Well, at least leaner and fitter. That was a year ago.
I started to dig around and do some research. My first radical decision was to cut out junk food. Not a tremendous step, but it forced me to learn how to cook in record time. Just cutting out junk food evened out my caloric intake. Quite by fluke I may add. My weight gain slowed to point of stopping all together. The most remarkable thing about cutting junk was way my body responded. I actually felt better; more up beat, even cool. Psychologically I felt better because I was doing something about my health; I was actively improving my life.
I was thinking about this while daydreaming at office. I really do work hard, but everyone has their moments. Anyway, I was daydreaming at office thinking about my active participation in shaping my life. When full weight of it came down on me (no pun intended). This epiphany came in two parts. Number one; it was my life. Number two; up until recently it had been passing me by in a most unsightly fashion. I sat bolt upright in my ergonomically designed chair, my eyes darting about office with a fire and intensity not seen in me since winning regional bicycle safety rally in grade three. I had decided that enough was enough.
