What Is My Purpose?

Written by Helaine Iris


What Is My Purpose? Helaine Iris © 2002

"When I chased after money, I never had enough. When I got my life on purpose and focused on giving of myself and everything that arrived into my life, then I was prosperous." --Wayne Dyer

For most of my life I can remember asking myselfrepparttar question, “Who am I and why am I here?” My answer to myself often left me feeling empty and wondering if I would ever know my true life’s purpose.

As a child and young woman, I didn’t have a grand dream or calling that I could remember. I was interested in a lot of different things and wasn’t afraid to explore. My parents, both successful individuals didn’t have glamorous careers or speak of lofty visions of achievement. Growing up with them, I knew I would get married, have a family and find something meaningful inrepparttar 101834 world that I would hope to find fulfillment in.

I found many gratifying things to do overrepparttar 101835 course of my life, I was a dancer, practiced as a midwife, owned a few businesses, and worked as a women’s health counselor. Although I appreciated these many opportunities and some of them were quite rewarding none of them ever hitrepparttar 101836 mark.

Left with a nagging feeling of dissatisfaction, there HAD to be something more to life. I kept looking for that one perfect opportunity,repparttar 101837 reason for my being, andrepparttar 101838 fulfillment of my purpose! Just likerepparttar 101839 predictability ofrepparttar 101840 seasons I kept asking myself, “Who am I and why am I here?” I was convinced that what I DID defined who I was and I discovered I wasn’t alone in this assumption.

If you ask a hundred people how they would define purpose they often respond by saying, purpose is what we are meant to “do” while we’re here on earth; it’s how we make a difference inrepparttar 101841 world utilizing our gifts and talents. This conventional perspective relies onrepparttar 101842 ability to somehow know or stumble across that magic thing that is your destiny to fulfill. No wonder many people go through life wondering what their purpose is and not feeling satisfied.

I began to look at purpose from a new and exciting perspective. Instead of purpose being my “doing-ness” in life, my purpose is my “being-ness”.

Your life purpose isrepparttar 101843 context or vessel that HOLDS your life suggests Dr. W. Bradford Swift, founder ofrepparttar 101844 Life On Purpose Institute and author of “Travelingrepparttar 101845 Purpose Path”. Imagine a beautiful jeweled goblet as your life purpose andrepparttar 101846 glorious wine within it your life. Can you see how your life purpose can shape your whole life as well as give it form and direction? Your life purpose, that beautiful vessel is a combination of three things: who you are atrepparttar 101847 very core, your vision for yourself and what you see possible forrepparttar 101848 world and your values. When I began to answer my own question, “who am I and why am I here” from this perspective a whole new world of fresh possibility opened up for me.

Breaking Your Relationship Pattern, Part 4

Written by Rinatta Paries


Finally, after all ofrepparttar hard work you have done completing your past, here is a way to break your relationship pattern.

Relationship choices are often based on patterns created in our childhood. These patterns are automatic and subliminal. We believe ours isrepparttar 101833 way relationships ought to be.

There is no problem having a pattern that leads you to loving, satisfying, long-term relationships. However, many people have patterns that cause them nothing butrepparttar 101834 heartache of unsuccessful relationships.

There is a way out, a way for you to be free of your particular pattern and to be free to make your relationship choices based on what you need and want. The best way is to understand where your relationship pattern comes from. Then you can consciously choose what works for you and what doesn't, what you want to continue and what you want to stop, and how you want your next relationship to be.

Below is a powerful exercise. In doing this exercise, you will discover information about your relationships and yourself. Knowledge of yourself is freedom to choose, freedom to act differently, freedom to have what you want.

Pattern Tracker©

Section 1. Instructions: Answerrepparttar 101835 following question for all of your significant past relationships. Significant means you had or still have strong feelings aboutrepparttar 101836 person. Go backwards in your history, starting withrepparttar 101837 most recent relationship. Write down your answers.

* What hurtful things did your partner do in your last relationship? * What hurtful things did your partner do inrepparttar 101838 relationship before that? * What aboutrepparttar 101839 relationship before that?

Section 2. Instructions: Answerrepparttar 101840 following questions and write down your answers.

* What hurtful things did your parent ofrepparttar 101841 opposite sex do to his/her partner? * What hurtful things did your parent ofrepparttar 101842 same sex do to his/her partner? * What hurtful things did your parent ofrepparttar 101843 opposite sex do to you? * What hurtful things did your parent ofrepparttar 101844 same sex do to you?

Section 3. Instructions: You will need to refer to your responses fromrepparttar 101845 previous two sections. To make answeringrepparttar 101846 following questions easier, you may want to copy out those responses. Write down your answers.

* What arerepparttar 101847 similarities betweenrepparttar 101848 hurtful behaviors of your parents and your past partners? * Arerepparttar 101849 behaviors opposite?

Section 4. Instructions: Answerrepparttar 101850 following questions, writing down your answers.

* Your parents' relationship with each other and with you isrepparttar 101851 basis for your relationship pattern. What kinds of pattern were you programmed to have in your intimate relationship? * Are you repeating your parents' relationship pattern in your own relationships? * Are you reacting to your parents' relationship by doingrepparttar 101852 opposite of their pattern?

Example: (Names and details changed to preserve privacy)

When my client Sonya did this exercise, she filled out Section 1 by listing all three of her significant relationship partners as unavailable and uninterested. Her most recent partner, Jeff, lives in New York, while she lives in Boston. He was barely making time for her. They were only seeing each other once a month and even then he would find reasons to be away from her. He was very argumentative and would never berepparttar 101853 one to say he was sorry.

Her previous partner, Ronald, simply did not want to continue in their relationship. Every time something would go wrong, he would back away a little bit more until there was no longer a relationship. Sonya wrote down that Ronald was unavailable because he was unable to be emotionally close. He was also uninterested -- he did eventually walk away fromrepparttar 101854 relationship. This man was not argumentative, instead avoiding arguments at all cost.

Sonya's very first significant partner, Rob, wasrepparttar 101855 love of her life. They loved each other deeply, but even that did not keep them together or prevent him from doing hurtful things. Asrepparttar 101856 relationship progressed he started to withdraw more and more. Eventually he lost interest in her physically. They tried to work it out, but he would shy away from confrontation and nothing ever got resolved.

Here is Sonya's Section 1: * Jeff was unavailable, uninterested and argumentative. * Ronald was unavailable and uninterested, and avoided confrontation. * Rob was withdrawn, uninterested, and avoided confrontation.

Sonya had to think hard about Section 2. She did not want to blame her parents or make them look bad. But as she thought about their relationship with each other and with her, she began to see some patterns.

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