WHEN YOU SEE REDWritten by Rhoberta Shaler
When you are feeling angry at someone, what do you do? Do you know how to express your feelings in ways that are clear and assertive? Many folks don't. For that reason, one of two things happens: they hold anger in, and, as we all know, it sneaks out in strange and often inappropriate ways, or, they explode and scatter their unhappiness over everyone, perhaps, destroying relationships on way! Neither of these are healthy alternatives.Anger is an arousal in body that is triggered by frustration, fear or hurt. As that arousal escalates, your body goes into stress response. When that arousal raises your heart rate to about 120 to 150 beats per minute, blood from frontal lobes of your brain, centers of reason and logic, drains down to protect your vital organs. This is not good news. Why? Because more angry you become, more unable you are to think clearly! You have probably experienced that. Just when you are at your loudest, wanting to deal death blow to prove your righteous position, you cannot think. Then, you often say one of best things you'll ever regret! Right? When body goes into arousal, notice. If you are talking to someone at time, think. It is important to your well-being and health of your
| | HOW MUCH ARE YOU?Written by Rhoberta Shaler
You have probably repeatedly heard, "Be all you can be!" How much is that? Do you have any idea? Do you have any idea of how much you want it to be?Platitudes are great. We throw them out and we think we have said something of great and profound importance. You might think that you have just divulged your heartfelt philosophy. You likely have, however, without pinning down their meaning for you and clarifying actions you must take, they simply assuage your conscience. Ooooh! That might be hard to hear! Let's start with my favorite book, dictionary. It says a platitude is 'the quality or state of being dull or insipid', and, 'a banal, trite or stale remark'. It's something said to state obvious or appear knowledgeable. Something general enough for everyone to have heard and agree to with no call to action. Let's not let, "Be all you can be!" become a platitude. You decide what it means to you. In marketing terms, that would be your positioning, your description of how you identify yourself. In 'Get What You Deserve', Jay Levinson, marketing guru, says, "You must choose a position you can live with, a position you can be proud of, a position you can deliver." Tall order! Are you ready? Be all you can be! Let's not let it become a pressure either, some elusive statement that leaves you perpetually feeling 'not good enough'. What is it, then? It's a call to choose as well as to act.
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