Two-Year Olds: The Original Freedom FightersWritten by Skye Thomas
We call him Buddha Napoleon. Anyone who's ever lived with a two year old knows exactly what I'm talking about. He's this amazing blend of cosmic beauty, love, and peace while simultaneously making it crystal clear that he's grand dictator of known universe. His little size never deters him from anything he sets his mind to. I'd forgotten so much since raising my first two children. The ten and twelve year age difference allows for that. Lucky for Buddha Napoleon, I've had practice and am therefore a lot more knowledgeable and patient this time around. I believe this is probably most important year for his social development. During first year of a baby's life, we're supposed to set a solid foundation of love and trust. That first year puts in place a basic belief that world is a wonderful place full of love and light, or it's not. The second year, we teach them to believe in themselves. Get up and walk, learn to speak, learn to manipulate toys, learn that ever important can-do attitude. After second birthday, it's all about personal power and boundaries. How do we get what we want from others? How do we stay out of trouble? Why do all of these stupid rules exist anyway? Do I have a right to tell you "No" since you say it to me all of time? What are consequences if I give in all of time? And if I don't give in, then what? Am I in charge of my life or are you? I think it's a miniature version of same dynamics we go through with our teenagers. They're just revisiting these same questions from a taller and more hormonal perspective. Handle two year old stage well, and I think you'll find teenage years aren't nearly so difficult. Remember back to when you were thirteen... did your folks answer your questions with, "Because I said so" or did they actually give you real reasons for their decisions? Which had a bigger impact on your ability to honor and respect their view point? It's no different with two year olds. Find vocabulary that they understand and explain to them why they can't scream at top of their lungs just to hear echo throughout grocery store. It hurts my ears. It hurts everyone in stores ears, and that's not okay. Explain why they can't kick and pound on you while you are buckling them into car seat. That hurts me, and I don't like it. Quite often they'll quit. You'll still have days when they'll do it anyway, but they'll completely understand why they're getting busted. They'll know that it's because they made a choice not because you're just being mean for heck of it. Over and over, you have to keep telling them why. They also need to see you enforce rules on others too. Role model for them that everyone in house is being held by same standards of behavior. Conduct yourself accordingly. Eventually, they'll come to agree with rules if they understand reasoning behind them. "Because I said so" isn't a reason that any self-respecting two year old will ever embrace.
| | Birthday Party Fun: Goodie Bag AlternativesWritten by Deborah Shelton
If you’re looking for alternatives to pricey goodie bags, here are a few ideas that will make your guests--and wallet- -happy. Any Fun Party: Take Polaroid photos of each guest with birthday child, and decorate cardboard picture frames, or make frames with popsicle sticks. Dance Party: Let birthday child create a mix CD of favorite music. Burn copies for everybody (and play it at party too!). Hawaiian Party: Decorate inexpensive plastic sunglasses with artificial flowers. String together more artificial flowers for one-of- a-kind leis. Royal Party: Decorate paper crowns and make scepters from wooden dowels and plastic jewels. Sleepover Party: Decorate plastic light-switch plates with stickers. Allow your young guests to embellish white pillowcases with fabric paints for a take-home sleepy surprise.
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