TransitionWritten by Dr. Dorree Lynn
Passage from one stage, place, stage, or subject to anotheróso states dictionary definitionówords that describe movement, but that say nothing of substance and depth of human feeling. Nothing of nights spent tossing and turning, when craving sleep we lie awake, fighting our personal demons and feelings of failure. Or, terror resulting in knotted stomachs, shallow breathing, and desire to remain in our comfort zone or to run far away. Neither does it tell of moments of quiet contemplation, contentment, and joy, feelings of accomplishment, even ecstasy and delight change can offer. Transitions, be they small or large are rarely finite. With revisionist minds, we place timeframes around experience. Perhaps we use a ritual such as a birth, wedding, illness, death, birthday, graduation, or a new newspaper editor to define these significant phases. I think, these transitions, life's ever in process changes, most often have ragged edges that bleed beyond our neatly bound boxes, starting before we are aware and morphing into next process we call change.
Sometimes change is thrust upon us. Sometimes, it is cultivated by choice. But, almost always, it requires courage. Courage, I think, necessitates accepting journey as a challenging adventure that will pull some new knowledge, fresh wonderment, or innovative direction from us. We human beings, such creatures of habit, so rarely stay put. Much as boomerang in Kubric's 2001 was tossed into beyond; we too, often fling ourselves into unknown.
As I age, I often think these kinds of thoughts. ďAging is no accident. It is necessary to human condition, intended by soul. I think, perhaps to learn more about integration of character and about love and essence of relationships. Eros, of Greek mythology, was youngest of gods, but also eldest. Love (and sex) from ancient point of view, a view that I agree with, is ever changing requiring new learning every step of way.
What Do We Tell Our Children?Written by Dr. Dorree Lynn
What Do We Tell Our Children? or Little Pitchers Have Big Ears
In last few days, be it on a TV interview, a call in program, at a meeting or a consultation, people ask variations of following questions. ďWhat do we tell our children about bombing? Shall we keep it a secret? Shall we wait with little ones until they ask? After all they donít know difference, anyway.Ē They say. ďAt what age can they comprehend what has happened? Wonít it scare them to talk to them?Ē
Adults often forget that children have ears. They make mistake of believing that if a child isnít told about an event, he or she wonít know what you donít want him or her to know. Remember your own youth. Didnít you learn almost everything your parents didnít want you to? Children pick up secrets like sponges. And, if you donít tell them your version, they will fill in blanks with mixed-up stories of their own.
Very young children donít know difference between reality and fantasy. One burning building looks like another, one they have seen in movies or on television or even a cartoon. But, depending upon how it is presented to them, children of about three can begin to differentiate fact from fiction.
During a crisis such as one we are undergoing, be it war or a terrorist situation, most important thing an adult can do is to tell simple truths calmly. I donít care if you have to go to bathroom and throw up because you are so upset. Remain calm and steady with your young children (and instruct their teachers to do same). If your children feel safe with you, they will have a much better chance of managing to decipher mťlange of facts and images bombarding them. It is a mistake to try to hide what is happening from any child that asks about an event or what they see on television or hear at school or in street. Over age of three, something must be said, even if they donít ask.