To Know You Is To Love You

Written by Skye Thomas


How do you show someone you love them? Do you buy them expensive gifts? Spend quality time together? Make personal sacrifices just to see them smile? Dedicate a song to them? Write a love letter or note of encouragement? Become their cheerleader? Those are wonderful things to do but my question goes deeper then those types of activities, even beyond your romantic partner. Think about your parents, your children, your best friend, your sister, or your brother... anyone you love. How do you really show them that you love them? Reverserepparttar question if you like - how do you really know if someone loves you?

The answer lies in getting to know them. To truly love someone is to care about them torepparttar 111228 very depth of who and what they are, what they believe, what they like, what they dislike, how they respond under pressure. It's so much more than what's their favorite color? Who's their favorite musician? All time favorite movie? It's knowing that they don't like fruit flavors in their colas, no cherry or lemon cokes. It's knowing just what temperature she likes her bubble bath. It's knowing that he prefers wearing cotton and why. It's knowingrepparttar 111229 perfect birthday present when they didn't even know what to ask for. It's looking at each other across a room and sharing a private joke without saying a word. Loving someone isrepparttar 111230 ability to see pastrepparttar 111231 polite response to "How's it going?" and knowing that they really aren't "Fine, thanks."

How do you get to that point? You watch them. You observe them. You ask them questions. You really listen to their answers. You figure it out. Why do you put so much time and energy into it? Because you love them. Because they fascinate you. Because you really don't have anything more important to do with your time. You are really truly present. You don't ever stop. How many relationships fizzle because we simply grow apart? We grow apart because we aren't paying attention to each other anymore. We are no longer connected.

Maybe you're bitter because your own needs aren't being met. Fair enough. It sucks to be in a one sided relationship. No argument there. Tell them. Tell them you feel ignored, unimportant, distant, like it just isn't special anymore. Tell your mother you miss being really connected and close. Tell your lover you feel likerepparttar 111232 two of you are running on autopilot and it just isn't that incredible close relationship that you once had. Tell your teenager that you haterepparttar 111233 distance that's growing between you. Reach out afterwards and ask them to share their heart's secrets with you. "Tell me who you are. Tell me what you dream of. Tell me, do you still love chocolate ice cream with Oreos onrepparttar 111234 side for breakfast? Tell me what your soul's made of, and I'll tell you about mine." Then listen, really listen. Hear their answers.

Insanity: a symptom of a new parent

Written by Marsha Maung


This was about 3 year ago but at that point in time, I probably didn’t noticerepparttar people who were sniggering uncontrollably behind me when I bent to pick uprepparttar 111227 pacifier that Joshua spat out ontorepparttar 111228 shopping mall floor. On top of putting on a fierce display of hygienic practices, I refused to let him haverepparttar 111229 same one back until it is completely sterilized. They could have been rolling around onrepparttar 111230 floor with laughter so bad that it made them rush torepparttar 111231 ladies to place all those loose brain cells they shook loose when they were laughing so hard. Paranoia is an inevitable symptom of first time parents.

If you try really hard, you can probably remember that ONE TIME, you almost threw a fit when your husband or wife changedrepparttar 111232 diaper 2 seconds later than immediately. Personally,repparttar 111233 second time round, I keptrepparttar 111234 ones that are not COMPLETELY soaked till it’s leaking throughrepparttar 111235 corners and make Jared wear them over again until it….well, got so soaked that it sunk to his toes, I guess.

I engaged in heated and intense debates with my husband regardingrepparttar 111236 bedsheets we used because it might cause an ‘allergic’ reaction in my baby. I locked horns with my mother-in-law because she usedrepparttar 111237 ‘sarong’ (cloth cradle) to lull my cranky child to sleep. I threw ballistic fits when I found out thatrepparttar 111238 pacifiers weren’t washed with specified nipple brushes and instead was washed using fingers and normal dishwashing liquid. Boy oh boy, did I really go overrepparttar 111239 top almost allrepparttar 111240 time!

With Josh, I only gave him ‘parent approved’ baby biscuits and cereals. Those that are not advertised or are produced by non-reputable companies WILL NOT be fed to my precious offspring lestrepparttar 111241 heaven part and threw pebbles ontorepparttar 111242 offender. With Jed, I can say that we feed him anything. I guess I figured out one thing alongrepparttar 111243 way. Heck, if we can eat it, he can too! Whyrepparttar 111244 heck not? He didn't really have to drink sterilized water till he's 18, did he? So, what’s so bad about a ‘potato chip’ here and there, now and again? Josh never experienced that kind of luxury until he was 2 and half, really.

The other differences that I noticed with my first and second child, with regards to my own personal attitude to parenting, is this: every month, there are at least 6 new toys for my baby to play with. I spent a vast percentage of my salary (I was working for someone else then) on toys forrepparttar 111245 kid that I adored. Fisher-Price and Kids II loved me….if not, they should.

I believed that only toys specially designed to educate my children would assist in their development. I bought this really funky (and EXPENSIVE) play table for Joshua one day and lugged it home in a taxi after work. I presentedrepparttar 111246 toy to Josh and he was playing with it. My husband asked me, “Why did you have to go buy ANOTHER toy for Josh? This isrepparttar 111247 third new toy we had this month and if this goes on, we’d have to purchase a land just to house all those toys”. I proceeded to educate him aboutrepparttar 111248 kinds of things that our precious son will learn when playing withrepparttar 111249 toy…like how to use this hands and fingers to turnrepparttar 111250 toys around, to feelrepparttar 111251 texture ofrepparttar 111252 material, to put one block on top of another. I felt that Joshua wouldn’t be good enough if he didn’t have this toy, really. Joshua would end up a loser if he didn’t have this toy. My child, Joshua, would wallow in despair if he didn’t have this toy.

Very nicely, my husband pointed this out: have you ever seen a normal human being who does NOT know how to performrepparttar 111253 above tasks byrepparttar 111254 time they were 3 years old? Good point, hurray! Butrepparttar 111255 toy stays.

Then, there’s Jed,repparttar 111256 poor deprived soul. He learnt to do everything his brother did, with only forks, spoons, empty bowls, discarded boxes, chopsticks, and any other thing we can find offrepparttar 111257 floor to play with. Imagine that. He also gets lots of presents too…like 2 presents A YEAR: Christmas and his birthday.

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