This was about 3 year ago but at that point in time, I probably didn’t notice people who were sniggering uncontrollably behind me when I bent to pick up pacifier that Joshua spat out onto shopping mall floor. On top of putting on a fierce display of hygienic practices, I refused to let him have same one back until it is completely sterilized. They could have been rolling around on floor with laughter so bad that it made them rush to ladies to place all those loose brain cells they shook loose when they were laughing so hard. Paranoia is an inevitable symptom of first time parents. If you try really hard, you can probably remember that ONE TIME, you almost threw a fit when your husband or wife changed diaper 2 seconds later than immediately. Personally, second time round, I kept ones that are not COMPLETELY soaked till it’s leaking through corners and make Jared wear them over again until it….well, got so soaked that it sunk to his toes, I guess.
I engaged in heated and intense debates with my husband regarding bedsheets we used because it might cause an ‘allergic’ reaction in my baby. I locked horns with my mother-in-law because she used ‘sarong’ (cloth cradle) to lull my cranky child to sleep. I threw ballistic fits when I found out that pacifiers weren’t washed with specified nipple brushes and instead was washed using fingers and normal dishwashing liquid. Boy oh boy, did I really go over top almost all time!
With Josh, I only gave him ‘parent approved’ baby biscuits and cereals. Those that are not advertised or are produced by non-reputable companies WILL NOT be fed to my precious offspring lest heaven part and threw pebbles onto offender. With Jed, I can say that we feed him anything. I guess I figured out one thing along way. Heck, if we can eat it, he can too! Why heck not? He didn't really have to drink sterilized water till he's 18, did he? So, what’s so bad about a ‘potato chip’ here and there, now and again? Josh never experienced that kind of luxury until he was 2 and half, really.
The other differences that I noticed with my first and second child, with regards to my own personal attitude to parenting, is this: every month, there are at least 6 new toys for my baby to play with. I spent a vast percentage of my salary (I was working for someone else then) on toys for kid that I adored. Fisher-Price and Kids II loved me….if not, they should.
I believed that only toys specially designed to educate my children would assist in their development. I bought this really funky (and EXPENSIVE) play table for Joshua one day and lugged it home in a taxi after work. I presented toy to Josh and he was playing with it. My husband asked me, “Why did you have to go buy ANOTHER toy for Josh? This is third new toy we had this month and if this goes on, we’d have to purchase a land just to house all those toys”. I proceeded to educate him about kinds of things that our precious son will learn when playing with toy…like how to use this hands and fingers to turn toys around, to feel texture of material, to put one block on top of another. I felt that Joshua wouldn’t be good enough if he didn’t have this toy, really. Joshua would end up a loser if he didn’t have this toy. My child, Joshua, would wallow in despair if he didn’t have this toy.
Very nicely, my husband pointed this out: have you ever seen a normal human being who does NOT know how to perform above tasks by time they were 3 years old? Good point, hurray! But toy stays.
Then, there’s Jed, poor deprived soul. He learnt to do everything his brother did, with only forks, spoons, empty bowls, discarded boxes, chopsticks, and any other thing we can find off floor to play with. Imagine that. He also gets lots of presents too…like 2 presents A YEAR: Christmas and his birthday.