Here you are, facing holiday season alone. Have you been thinking about?

*how alone and lonely you feel *excuses you can give family members as to why you can't come this year *what friends may be available to spend those long days with *how another year has passed and you are (still) single *how unfair it is that everyone else seems so happy and connected *how you will handle office holiday party- single, take a friend, not attend *going to a far away (tropical?) place to escape it all *hiding out, alone, in your own home.

If these thoughts sound familiar it is probably time to reflect on your feelings regarding this holiday season. If your goal is to hide out and endure it alone, you won't need to do too much planning. However, if you wish to experience at least a measure of "peace and joy" associated with this time of year, you need to make and follow through with plans that allow you to participate in ways that are meaningful to YOU.

Remember, your senses are bombarded from October to December with music, images and Hallmark verses depicting "right" experiences and expressions for season. Remind yourself, every day if necessary, that there's nothing wrong with being single. You have same need and right to enjoy this season as any couple or family does. How you choose to do this is up to you. After you have done some serious reflection, consider following list of 10 holiday tips designed especially for singles.

1. Don't make plans out of a sense of obligation. This is also your holiday season. Set limits, make good choices and enjoy. You may ask yourself; "do I really want to go out"? If so, make your next question something like; "does it sound like something I would enjoy or be interested in?" Or, "will I have opportunity to meet and mix with other singles?"

2. Avoid unrealistic expectations from others, from yourself and from holidays themselves. Relax, enjoy and don't expect so much that you will feel hurt or disappointed when things don't turn out just as you had imagined. This will defeat all positive feelings and experiences that you may have already gained.

Dating during holiday season can be a special treat. Of course, in order to fully experience this you may need to re-order some priorities and make time for yourself and your own personal needs. Don’t give into temptation to put your social life on hold until after New Year. Manage those work projects and family demands in a way that leaves you open to try some of romantic and fun-filled activities that are available at this time of year.

The following 10 date ideas should help put you in mood and may even inspire you to come up with a few on your own.

1.Have a “progressive” dinner together. Go to one place for your appetizer, another (romantic and intimate) place for your dinner; and then have dessert and coffee (nightcap), in a quiet spot with a beautiful view of holiday lights or other holiday views. Even better, go by limo, so you have all your time to focus on each other and don’t have to worry about all driving.

2. Take a holiday tour of historic homes in your area. Many areas of country have these. Often they are done in evening by candlelight. Afterwards, you can go for a walk and view surrounding neighborhood lights and decorations. Finish with coffee in a quiet bistro.

3. Get dressed up and attend a holiday concert or play. You can spend a lot or very little on this kind of date, depending where you go for entertainment. A nice little before or after meal fills out evening.

4. Go and get hot chocolate with your date; then go look at Christmas lights or displays available in your area. Many places have dazzling displays that light up night.

5. Go ice skating together. Find a nice place, not too crowded. This brings out playful side and encourages a lot of interaction with each other. Hold hands, show off, race- be kids again!