In much-underrated 1990 film Avalon, a Russian immigrant to 1940s America relates disintegration of his family ties. In his young manhood, his children gathered at feet of older relatives during family gatherings and listened to tales of their heritage and history. As television took hold of society in late '50s, children and adults alike opted for entertainment of television personalities, instead of stories of their roots.

But just as art of listening to stories has gone by wayside, so has art of telling them. Here's how to re-start a tradition of storytelling at your family reunion.

•Advise all who will be attending that there will be an opportunity to tell some stories about family, and let them know you'd love to hear them share something. Especially encourage older ones to think about their children when they were young, their own childhood, or even stories they may remember from their parents. With only a little effort, you can be hearing about things that happened over a century ago.

•Have some questions prepared to start ball rolling. "Where did your family go on vacation when your children were small?" "How did you and Grandpa meet?" "What's funniest thing one of your children ever did?" "How did you manage through tough times?"

While it’s not entirely true that "everything I need to know about raising kids I learned behind a barber chair," it is true that I've learned some things.

I was reminded of these things, after hearing a sad statement from a conscientious dad. He said that he and his son are now on different paths. I asked how old his son is. "Twelve," he answered. I thought of how close I am to Jon, our 22-year-old son, and how it would hurt me to think we were "on different paths" when he was twelve.

But, I also thought of many kids who come through our doors and of many parents who seem to be getting it right. Thus, I've developed sort of a "Barber-osophy for Raising Good Kids." Here are a few such "Barber-osophies":

1. Be in charge. It doesn't seem possible that a 4-year-old child can control a 40-year-old parent. However, I've seen it happen, and it makes you wonder who is child and who is parent. It also makes you wonder if child abuse doesn't sometimes take form of a parent who won't take charge.