What impact would it have on your professional and personal life if you could learn
secret of successful living known by about 25% of people? Think about that for a minute and even pause right now and write some thoughts down. How would your life be different if you operated like a "thriver" - a person who thrives and flourishes no matter what life throws at him or her? In Webster's II New Riverside Dictionary, definition of thrive is: "(v) (1) to be healthy or do well: flourish. (2) to be successful: prosper." In field of positive psychology, thriving is defined as "reconstructing life's meaning in response to life's most destructive occurrences." So, it's not that people who thrive go around unrealistically whistling a happy tune all day long. But they are conscious creators of their lives, not mindless acceptors. They know their power lies within.
I thought I had coined word thriver when I first set out on my speaking and coaching career in 2001. But, as I did research and reading on topic of thriving, I found that thriver was a little known word used primarily in medical profession to denote a group of people who, when faced with major life challenges, choose to get a grip and get on with making it through tough times in fine fashion rather than caving in. Dr. Paul Pearsall, who wrote a great book about thrivers called The Beethoven Factor quoted one thriver he interviewed as saying, "think of thriving as 5 C's. Think of it as ability to transform a life Catastrophe into a Catalyst for a Creative Change of Consciousness." I like to call thrivers "creative solutions experts".
The word survivor has had much play in past few years through popular TV shows and books. But, here's Webster's definition of survive: "(v) to continue to live or exist. (2) to live longer than: outlive. - survival (n) - survivor (n)".
Why would you care to just "exist", when you could "flourish" in your personal and professional life? Studies done by researchers in field known as "positive psychology" show that 75% of Americans between 25-74 do not fit criterion of "flourishing in life". Instead a full 75% of us are seen to be languishing - "emotionally and spiritually fatigued from trying to keep up…generally devoid of highly positive and optimistic feelings towards living", as defined by Dr. Pearsall.
We'll never move ourselves, our families, our communities, our nation and our world forward in this new millennium with so many people in such a state. But good news is that it is possible for each of us to shift out of that mode of thinking - that defeatist way of operating.
Research shows that we can all cultivate attitude of a thriver. It starts with a willingness to do so. "Our attitudes are our mental stances, positions we hold vis-à-vis life. In some ways our attitudes determine everything because they are glasses through which we see world.", writes M J Ryan in her inspirational little book, Attitudes of Gratitude. And, as Dr. Wayne Dyer, noted psychologist and author, says, "When you change way you look at things, things you look at change.". I believe that change happens moment desire meets momentum.
I encourage all of us to stop aspiring to be last guy/gal on island eating few remaining bugs. It's time now to make heroes of those people who not only THRIVE in their lives, but help others thrive as well. Let's make thrivers our role models. And then let's get busy becoming thrivers ourselves and inspiring others around us to do same.
The Thrivers Secrets To Success:
1. Thrivers don't moan and groan, they make things happen. As noted playwright, author and satirist George Bernhard Shaw noted, "The people who get on in this world are people who get up and look for circumstances they want and if they don't find them, make them."
2. Thrivers have ability to laugh and find humor in things. They know instinctively what research now shows, that our ability to assign a positive meaning to whatever happens to us makes all difference. As psychologist and author Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's notes, "thrivers' happiness is not dependent on external factors or life circumstances alone. It derives from their chosen state of consciousness and ability to cheer themselves up when things are looking down."
