The Start of Civilisation via the Back Passage!Written by Thick Mick
Following is an excerpt from The Trivial Times . Some consideration must be made for many memory inconsistencies of Thick Mick. He does his best! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mick here, It's hard to believe, I know, but Civilisation was man-made, and my great grand uncle won a Nobel Piece Prize for his part. Wind back your time-piece to year 6000 B.C., and be careful not to break spring as I did. It was winter, as usual, and though our daily lives appeared to be will of external forces, some special people had foresight to make decisions that would affect todays' population. Though I get over-paid for my column, please be patient as I take you through it. There was a particular Pagan ritual that provided us with fun, on face of it, but was actually a brainstorm that ensured current judical system of today. It was known as THE GAME. This wasn't a nocturnal activity, or a matching of skills for that matter. We had no skills! It was latin for "MAGE" or "Mag", and was a much finer publication than trivial times, even with chisel marks. The Mag was prize for a one thousand feet free-fall dive into a pool. We had no spring boards either, or indeed, restrictive swim suits. The pool was not like modern olympic standard pools of today, which drain chlorine-laden storm water to innards of earth.
| | The Back Passage!Written by Thick Mick.
Some consideration must be made for many memory inconsistencies of Thick Mick. He does his best! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mick here. It was a long, long time ago. Sweden, North Europe, Scotland, Ireland, North America and Canada were part of same mainland. This mainland existed before crustal plates separated, and before Atlantic came into being. To give you a reference point in history, my great grandfather was just a young man. I remember with joy, historical accounts he impressed on us, as we ate around a primitive butane barbeque. To clarify that, we sat around it eating, rather than eating grass and sundry bushes around it. Well, he told us with crystal clarity how he used to cycle from Canada to Sweden in five hours, with no more than one puncture repair kit, and a bicycle, presumably. He didn't have to tell us every single detail! The roads at time, weren't much like motorways/highways of today. Instead of quartz and limestone impregnated asphalt of today, they had a simple sandstone. Incidentally, this was readily available from Japan which was only a few hundred yards away, at time. Punctures were common place and both courtship and commerce were reliant on a high performance repair kits. On one particular day, I recall him saying, he went for a cycle to discover new continence continents, and ended up in Venezuela or something. Feeling peckish (understandable after an eight hour cycle against wind ), he went into a burger joint. He often remarked "Burgers in Venezuela invariably have more grissle (cartilage, in English ) than venison in Boston (American, in America )".
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