It seems much easier to fall in love than to stay in love. --DR. KAREN KAYSER. 

Would you want to marry in haste and repent at leisure? No, folk. May that not be your destiny. But you see, marriage is like a packed theater with some uninterested spectators wanting to get out, and other interested ones waiting outside, wishing to get in.

If you think though that marriage can solve all of your problems, you are mistaken. Ask a married friend. But it can give you a measure of security and satisfaction if you play by rules.

But we forget rules, before we rush into matrimony. And when a sailor forgets his navigation rules, he suffers a shipwreck.

You see, people enter into marriage relationships with little or no preparation. If you were entering university for example, you will be asked to sit for a qualifying exam. You may even be asked to show other supporting qualifications like TOEFL if you were heading for a U.S. university.

But these are small things compared to permanent relationship of marriage. Yet only requirement in marriage registry is your signature. Nothing else.

However, there are dangers to watch out for just before you append your signature to that marriage certificate. And what are they?

Failed Expectations

People think of marriage as a kind of fiction story where characters live happily ever after. But it is never so. Because great expectation of your Sleeping Beauty or Prince Charming may turn out to be a bad dream. The love, attention and support that you badly craved before marriage may turn out to be a tale of rejection and disillusion.

Incompatibility

You may also discover after marriage that both of you are poles apart -- with different interests. Those characteristics which were hidden before marriage now becomes manifest. And it becomes a story of if I had known. (No thanks to mismatch and your beguiling mate!)

Conflict

Your Happy Valley or Fortunate Isles, now turns to be a battlefield of squabbling, fighting, and God forbid -- physical violence. The very sweet words, like honeycombs which were used to win your hand in marriage now become weapons of abuse and war.

Apathy

It may be that you will one day find yourself saying: I am no longer interested. And then marriage drags on and on, like a factory worker tolerating a bad job -- to keep body and soul together. And one day, apathy turns to hate, and you find yourself telling your partner that game is up!

Money

Do not deceive yourself thinking that money will make you happy. It does opposite, says Paul Getty American millionaire.

"Your father didn't teach you right, THAT'S your problem," I am told. It's late January, 1999. I sit in a small, maternity ward meeting room at Hillcrest hospital in Mayfield Heights, a suburb of Cleveland. I nurse my baby girl, while sharing childbirth stories with two other post partum moms. The three of us are African American. Our talk turns to religion. I say I'm Buddhist. Next thing I know, my Baptist-preacher father is being called a bad parent. He isn't even around to defend himself.

Almost 13 years ago I emerged from a life of hellish suffering. I had been in and out of battles with eating disorders, suicidal depression and substance abuse, and I had dropped out of college. I found unshakable happiness within myself by embracing Nichiren Buddhism as a member of Soka Gakkai International (SGI-USA). If I had talked to that mother on maternity ward a bit longer, maybe she would have blasted me for choosing a religion that's not "Black enough," like others have. When I'm labeled a cultural sell-out for not being Christian, I reply that, like many Blacks, I believe that Jesus probably had African ancestry, but most folks also believe he lived in Middle East, and that area's not known for having much American-style "it's-a-Black-thing" flavor.

More importantly, I think that religion should be about something deeper than cultural identity. Religion should squarely address three fundamental questions we each need to ask—"Where did I come from? Why was I born? And what happens to me when I die?" Religion should also enable one to live each day joyfully, and with inner resources it takes to move both mole hills and mountains. In Nichiren Buddhism, all of these requirements are met to my satisfaction.

[Buddhist Teachings] This Buddhism teaches that our lives are eternal and that on deepest level we are all Buddhas, or people enlightened to ultimate truth of life. It teaches that each one of us is worthy of greatest respect.