The Problem With New Year's ResolutionsWritten by Cyndi Smasal
You have permission to publish this article electronically or in print, free of charge, as long as signature box is included.Thanks, Cyndi Smasal Word Count: 287 words at 65 characters per line ================= The Problem With New Year's Resolutions Cyndi Smasal (c) 2002 The moment you make a New Year's Resolution, you have a problem. Here's why. When you make a resolution you are telling yourself that you want more than you already have. For example, you resolve to quit smoking or lose weight to have a more healthy lifestyle. When you make a resolution like this, you are asking yourself to change way you live. To change way you live, you will have to grow. The potential problem begins when you want to do something new that doesn't match person whom you know yourself to be. This creates an internal conflict. Part of you wants to change, and another part of you wants to remain who you are out of habit. Many times this internal conflict creates negative self-talk or criticism, which can paralyze you and stop you from keeping your resolution.
| | Get a Coach and Make Your Resolutions Happen This YearWritten by Susan Dunn, Professional Coach
How's your list of New Year's resolutions coming? Studies show that most people have already failed by 15th of January. Has this happened to you? If so, you may have left out prime ingredient for your success - a coach! Coaching is a new field. Until you've talked to someone who's had a coach, or seen results happen in someone who's had a coach, or been coached yourself, it's hard to figure out just what "coaching" is. A NEED THAT WASN'T BEING MET Coaching developed to meet a need that wasn't being met. We've all wished at one time or another we had a coach, like Tiger Woods, for instance. Someone who could help us be all we could be. Where could you go if you didn't need "fixing" but could use some suggestions? Therapy exists because it, too, is needed, but coaching isn't therapy. Some people enjoy benefits of both therapy and coaching, which demonstrates two are not same thing. Coaching supplies something therapy can't, and vice versa. In coaching, we focus on strengths and move forward. It's rapid and effective. A FRIEND So it's like having a friend? No, not in least. Here's why: · Coaching is work. Done properly it takes energy and focus and a completely different mindset. · Friends have agendas of their own. They aren't objective. · Friends aren't experienced. · Friends are usually unidimensional in their relationship to you. Most of us have a strong network of friends and we know whom to go to for what we want. We know what "answer" they're going to give us. There are no surprises. · A coach puts your interests before theirs and keeps focus totally on you. · Coaches are trained to clear their minds for a coaching session and remove all their own issues. A coach is someone you can go to who is trained to give you what is needed, not necessarily what you want, and if they're a good coach. They have a full repertoire of tools to use to orient to situation. They can change their tact depending upon what they sense you need at time. QUESTIONS NOT ANSWERS A turning point in my life was when my own coach listened to me heading in a wrong direction and said, "Why would you want to do something you don't like with kind of people you don't like?" Coaches are trained to listen, and to ask hard questions that tap into your own wisdom. There are times in our lives when we're asking wrong question, or seeking to solve wrong problem, and lack objectivity to see beyond it. We "can't see forest for trees." A coach lays down bread crumb trail! In my case, I was trying to figure out how to be happy doing something I hated. The obvious question to ask me was why was I continuing to beat my head against a brick wall. If you keep doing what you've been doing, you're going to keep getting what you've been getting … even if, especially if, you do it harder and better, which we tend to do.
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