The key to overcoming shyness can be long, discouraging and difficult yet at same time it can be quite simple and very effective. It requires setting up a plan with many different goals. Now let me give you an example of a plan to start with.

Let’s say that these are four different aspects you need to work on to overcome your shyness.

1- Body Language

2- Small Talk

3- Meeting New People

4- Assertiveness

What you need to do is concentrate on one aspect at a time. If you attempt to work on all 4 categories you are guaranteed to fail and become discouraged. So let’s take simplest category, #3.

Take a look back across your life and at difficult things that you have already accomplished. For some, finishing high school seemed impossible only to graduate from college. Others set out for a career and ended up owning their own business. No matter who you are, you have accomplished many things in your life. I venture to say that many of your accomplishments were at one time or another, a goal. Goals and dreams give hope and ability to achieve things otherwise not realized. If you can institute following keys into your daily routine, you can realize more goals and reach new heights of success. What are keys and how do they work?

1. Identify Goal

In order to achieve, you must set and accomplish goals. Goals give purpose and make us feel good about ourselves.

Think about horse pulling a cart with carrot dangling out in front. What purpose does carrot serve? It’s dream and desire. When horse wakes up each morning, I doubt that he is very excited about pulling a cart all around town. But add carrot and we have created purpose and motivation. All day long carrot hangs out in front and all day long horse chases it. People laugh at horse because of its simplicity. But during first five minutes of day horse has identified goal to get carrot. At end of day, horse is rewarded for its perseverance. While we all might laugh at this little analogy, what would happen if we inserted this horse mentality into our daily lives?

I agree that it isn’t that simple; however, do not make it harder than it has to be. There is a simple system to creating and accomplishing goals. You cannot just wish your goals; you need to install structure in your life for establishing goals and achieving your desired success.

First, goal statements need to be specific. Simply setting a goal to lose weight isn’t enough; being specific will allow you to better define goal and create a stronger plan for success. “I would like to lose 10 pounds by June 1st” is a much stronger goal. This gives goal more credibility and creates need for a specific plan.

Next, your goals need to be achievable. Achievable does not mean easy. Goals should require you to move outside your comfort zone. Goals are meant to help us accomplish things, but do not make them impossible. Sometimes accomplishments might be small and other times they might be great. But, each one should require you to elevate yourself in order to see through to accomplishment. This stretching will make you stronger and build your confidence to achieve greater goals. When I think of this process, I visualize athletes pushing themselves and their bodies beyond where they have ever been. Why? In order to build larger and stronger muscles, weight must be gradually increased. This weight increase in turn develops muscles and new, higher levels of strength. Without increase of weight, muscles will not get stronger. I believe same principle holds true in setting and accomplishment of goals. Goals need to require more effort than last, thus making you stronger.

Third, establish a deadline or date for accomplishment of your goal. The date can be just around corner or somewhere in distant future; setting any date is important part. A date will allow you to keep your eyes looking forward and not looking back. The goal lies in future; now let’s get after it!

Finally, make a list of your goals. Create a “Goal Contract” with yourself. Write down your goals, include all of specifics and sign it. This further solidifies your commitment to goal(s). Now, find a moment each day to review your goals. Make them part of your daily routine.

2. Create a Battle Plan for Success

I like to use words “battle plan”, because accomplishing goals is not easy. Around every turn there will be obstacles. You will quickly recognize some obstacles and others will appear without warning, like an ambush. You may have control over outcome or you may be reliant upon another for help. Either way, it is going to be a constant challenge for you to keep moving forward, even through setbacks. The key to overcoming setbacks is to learn from what has happened and then alter or strengthen your battle plan. Mel Gibson said regarding his making of Academy Award winning epic, Braveheart, "You have to go in with a plan. You can deviate from it, though -- it's just a jumping off point."

As you are formulating your plan, ask yourself these questions: “What tools do I need to accomplish my goal(s)? What resources do I have at my disposal? How long do I have to accomplish my goal? Whose help might I need to realize success in my goal?” Answering these questions will help you think through what is needed to ensure success.