The Higher Up You Go the More You Need EQ?

Written by Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach


I’m listening torepparttar radio this morning as callers talk about Martha Stuart’s sentence. Caller number one says it was too strict a penalty. She should’ve been given a small fine. It was enough she lost what she did inrepparttar 130019 stock market.

Caller number two says it wasn’t nearly enough for what she did. She should be given a huge fine and more prison time.

OPINIONS VARY. WHO’S RIGHT? HOW DO YOU DECIDE?

Earlier I read an article about television censorship. The man in charge at one ofrepparttar 130020 studios lamented that it wasn’t like he had a list of 30 things he couldn’t say. People think there’s a list, he said, and there isn’t. That was an eye opener to me. I, too, thought he had a list! How then is he supposed to know what’s in and what’s not? How can he make this decision?

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO? THERE ARE NO RULES.

Mary Ann’s gynecologist tells her she needs a certain test, but if he orders it, insurance won’t pay. “But,” he says, “There’s a way around this. If you go to your GP…”

KNOW THE RULES SO YOU KNOW HOW TO BREAK THEM.

I GOT IT HANDLED Oops, no I don’t.

·“There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.” ~ Henry Kissinger, “NY Times Magazine, 1969, U. S. politician ·“The more things change,repparttar 130021 more they remain … insane.” ~ Michael Fry and T. Lewis, “Overrepparttar 130022 Hedge,” 05.09.04

Emotional Intelligence means being able to make good decisions with limited data, decisions that require maturity and wisdom. It’s lonely there. If you ask around, asrepparttar 130023 radio DJ did, you’ll get differing opinions about what’s right and wrong. Whenrepparttar 130024 TV censor man asks around, he finds a blackhole. You’re on your own. The physician making his way throughrepparttar 130025 maze of managed care has to know whererepparttar 130026 entry points are. It’s more than knowing medicine these days.

Butrepparttar 130027 pressure isn’t only atrepparttar 130028 top. It’s lonely alongrepparttar 130029 way. Lonely and stressful.

STRESS

The Society for Neuroscience defines stress as “any external stimulus that threatens homeostasis –repparttar 130030 normal equilibrium of body function.” The most powerful stressors, they say, are “psychological and psychosocial stressors that exist between members ofrepparttar 130031 same species.”

That means we’re driving each other nuts! We no longer have to cope with lions and tigers, just with one another.

Some ofrepparttar 130032 OTHER most powerful stressors are psychological and psychosocial stressors that go on in our own brains. We’re stressed when we’re called upon to do deal withrepparttar 130033 constant and increasingly rapid changes of day-to-day life, andrepparttar 130034 insecurity.

Stress activates physiological systems we can’t use in today’s world. If there’s a tiger in front of you,repparttar 130035 chemicals start pumping to prime you to run and you can. If you’re stuck in a traffic jam, there will be no running and you continue to send out cortisol (which can eventually weaken muscles and weaken support bodily systems) and epinephrine (increases blood pressure), which together can contribute to a host of health problems including chronic hypertension, hardening ofrepparttar 130036 arteries and assault onrepparttar 130037 immune system, which is, atrepparttar 130038 bottom line, our health.

How to Have a More Sensual Relationship

Written by Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach


Couples want to know how to make their relationships more sensual. They know something is missing inrepparttar sex-for-orgasm experience, delightful as it is. The trouble is, it can become almost pragmatic, a means to an end.

Hunting forrepparttar 130017 G-spot and popping Viagra® can become like making bread in a bread-making machine instead of by hand. You will enjoy an enhanced and deeply bonding experience when you moverepparttar 130018 focus torepparttar 130019 five senses: sight, sound, touch, smell and taste.

MAKE SOME BREAD

Making bread in a bread-making machine is one-step better than going out and buying a loaf of bread, but you're still missing one ofrepparttar 130020 most sensual experiences you can have. Done right, it engages allrepparttar 130021 senses. It also takes time. Taking time is what we think we haverepparttar 130022 least of, and yet it is necessary for a sensual experience. There is nothing mechanical about making bread by hand, no buttons to push, nor is it efficient.

How to proceed? It takes only a few, cheap ingredients. Just throw them all into a bowl, mix it up, and then get your hands in there forrepparttar 130023 kneading. Here's a recipe and instructions: http://www.breadworld.com/beginnertips/begintipsd.asp . You'll need to position yourself correctly, use muscles in your upper arms, and all parts of your hands -- fingers, palms, heels. Roll it withrepparttar 130024 heel of your hand and slide your fingers back over it, caressing it with your palm. (You getrepparttar 130025 idea!) Enjoy asrepparttar 130026 dough changes from flour + water to a glistening, beautiful, shining, malleable thing. (Get messy and get into it!)

When is it ready? You have to learn that by experience. (Get it?)

For extra credit: Putrepparttar 130027 bread inrepparttar 130028 oven and smell it baking.

And don't miss slicing into it when it's piping hot, and spreading real butter on it and SAVOURING it!

PROCESS

Seerepparttar 130029 difference inrepparttar 130030 experience? Both accomplishrepparttar 130031 same goal, i.e., making bread, but with one of them getting there is definitely halfrepparttar 130032 fun!

Transform other daily experiences into something sensual applying what you've learned from this. Do you grabrepparttar 130033 dog, brush him as quick as you can and move on torepparttar 130034 next task? If so, you're missingrepparttar 130035 sensual experience of combingrepparttar 130036 dog's hair, feeling his body and musculature, observing his reactions and expressions, using your hands, etc. You're GETTING A JOB DONE, not HAVING A SENSUAL EXPERIENCE.

You can learn to transform your relationship throughrepparttar 130037 magic of sensuality following these steps, in no particular order:

1. SPEND TIME EXPLORING WHAT YOU LIKE SENSUALLY.

That relates torepparttar 130038 5 senses (sight, sound, smell, taste and touch): What smells good to you and what doesn't? What looks good to you and what doesn't? What feels good against your skin and body and what doesn't? What tastes good and what doesn't? What sounds good and what doesn't?

2. GET TO KNOW YOUR PHYSIOLOGICAL RESPONSES TO YOUR SENSUAL EXPERIENCES.

Ask yourself several times a day, "How am I feeling emotionally, spiritually, physically and mentally?" Answerrepparttar 130039 question. Then process what sensory experiences led to what feeling.

3. ASK YOUR PARTNER HOW HE OR SHE FEELS. This is not "How are you?" "Fine." Put downrepparttar 130040 newspaper, turn offrepparttar 130041 TV, turn and look at your partner, and ask, "How are you feeling emotionally, spiritually, mentally and physically?" Then listen and learn.

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