Surviving Life After DivorceWritten by Sharon Jacobsen
After divorce, most important thing you can do is to move forward sensibly. Here are ten steps to help you on your way back to a fulfilling life. 1. Think single. As obvious as it may seem, you're no longer one half of a couple and that can take some getting used to. After all, life as a single woman is very different to life you've been leading for a major part of your life. Take time to understand changes that are happening in your life and don't expect it to be easy. 2. Remind yourself that it's ok to be single. In a society where single women are often looked down at by their married peers, they can easily find themselves believing that they're failures; that "real" women are involved in loving, lasting relationships. That simply isn't true. More and more women are choosing to remain single, or to break out of unfulfilling relationships, something which shows strength rather than weakness. Surviving means believing in yourself and your capabilities as a single woman. 3. Don't try to get even. No matter how angry you are at your partner, even if he's been unfaithful to you, don't try to get your own back. You'll just end up exhausting your personal energy on something that isn't going to be least bit fruitful. It certainly won't get him back but bitterness will most likely stop you from moving on. You don't deserve that, so don't do it! Try to approach your anger in a sensible manner, one that will constructive in helping you back to a healthy, emotional state of mind. Writing down exactly what is making you angry and why can often help you to understand and deal with your feelings. Find a friend who'll listen and tell her how you feel. Anger needs an outlet, but revenge isn't a healthy way of venting it. 4. Accept that relationship is over. When you're living alone and your partner has moved on, it should be easy to accept that it's over. Unfortunately, this is something that a lot of women have problems with. You may find yourself making excuses to visit him by forgetting things at his place or needing to discuss something trivial regarding children. Don't crowd him. Talk to him when you need to, visit if you must, but be polite, keep your distance emotionally, and accept that you now lead separate lives. The sooner you accept this, sooner you will be able to find happiness again. 5. Don't live in past. No doubt you've got some great memories from your time together, you would never have stayed together as long as you did if there were never any good times. Remember them by all means, but don't dwell on them. If you find yourself wishing that everything could be "like that" again, give yourself a mental slap and remind yourself that there are some fantastic moments waiting for you in future and that past is nothing but a memory. You can learn from it but you can't change it or return to it. It's over. Gone. The future is what you should be thinking about now!
| | 6 Ways to Support Another WomanWritten by Yolanda Shoshana
Every Thursday, I have been glued to hit television show, 'The Apprentice". It is drama at it's finest, except there is something that is painful for me to watch as a woman. When show began women dominated and worked together as a team. As time progressed women slowly but quickly began to rip each other apart and then... there were none, leaving two men standing for high profile position to work for Donald Trump. The "catfights" between women have continued and are clearly evident as they make media rounds. Meanwhile, Kwame and Troy had a small show down only to be followed with words of loyalty and strong hugs and handshakes. When will women learn to stick together through good, bad, and ugly?6 Ways to Support Another Woman: 1) Don't hate player, hate game. Women tend to get very competitive in looks, love, and career. Stop "catfight". Focusing on your goal will get you further, than focusing hostility on another woman who you deem as competition. Maybe just maybe, it is situation that you are angry with and not person. 2) Stop calling other women by derogatory words. Does calling another woman a bitch do anything to help situation? Remember where words like bitch, cunt, and whore come from. Stop using them as weapons against other women. Using harmful word give them life and words keep coming back to YOU either physically or mentally.
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