I have been unable to find a universally accepted, fits-all definition of spam. There are many ideas about spam and just what it really is. In my opinion it is receiving unsolicited email (email which you have not opted to receive). Even this definition must be applied judiciously and with a certain amount of common sense.

For example, a dear friend could forward an email which you find offensive. Should you be in a bad mood, you could report your friend for spam (and also originator of email your friend forwarded, even though it was not originator's intent for you to receive this unsolicited email). In this situation originator (who is innocent of wrongdoing) and your friend will most likely lose their ISP and web host provider simply because you are having a bad day. Is this fair?

More and more ezine publishers and article writers are being accused of spam and forced to fight their ISPs and web host providers. Many of these spam complaints are totally unfounded. In some cases it is because a person forgot they subscribed to ezine and when they receive it they say they have been spammed. In other cases person has written an article which was published in an ezine accused of spamming. Here all advertisers and article writers are accused of spam and lose their ISPs and web host providers.

These advertisers and article writers did not commit offense of spamming. They were accused by association. Most articles written for internet are free for publication, which means anyone can use them as long as articles and resource boxes remain intact. Unless writer is being paid for article, there is no way of knowing when, how or by whom article will be published.

The truly unfair method currently used to fight spam considers everyone accused of spam to be automatically guilty. The great majority of ISPs and web host providers shut you down without a second thought when you are accused of spam.

You are not given a chance to prove your innocence. Guilty or not, you are shut down. For most of those trying to make a profit on internet, this is a sword hanging over their heads. Every time they write an article for publication or send out an ezine they are taking chance of being unfairly accused of spamming.

Spam is four-letter word that most offends those of us working online. Everyone with a website receives it and like bad art, we all know it when we see it. But also -like art- in a way, spam is in eye of beholder. I have participated in discussions that disintegrated because each member had his or her own definition of spam and was angry at those who disagreed.

In offline world, it is perfectly acceptable to cold-call or snail mail a business to tell them about a product or service you offer. When I worked in an office environment, I took such calls all time. Often, I said 'no thank you' and that was end of it. But every once in a while, call came in at just time I was searching for such an item - and a sale would be made.

Of course, power and low-cost of email make this an inexact comparison. So what do you do when you have a product or service that you *know* your target market *needs* -- and you want to use power of Internet to let them know about it?

THE PERSONAL APPROACH

The keywords are 'target market.' Find out who they are by doing an Internet search to find them. Check out sites which include directories of businesses in your target market. Then, visit those sites - and send their owners a *personal* email pitching your product. Be sure to use their *names* and comment on something you learn about their businesses from their sites. If they offer newsletters, sign up for them and comment upon something you read there. This establishes a prior business relationship and is not considered spam by *most* people.

However, even this personal approach will offend *some* webmasters, and it will cost you a lot of time relative to number of people you reach. A more efficient means of getting your message out would be to join discussion groups geared to your audience and announce your product there.

ONLINE NETWORKING THROUGH DISCUSSION LISTS

But message boards and discussion lists have their own spam issues. When joining a list, you must read their guidelines and follow them. Sending out a blatant advertisement to members of a discussion list will not be tolerated - but you are welcome to describe your business where it is *appropriate* (i.e., someone asks where they can find a product just like yours and you announce that you just happen to sell that).

You are also allowed to put information in your sig line that directs people to your website - so whenever you contribute to discussion, you have an opportunity to promote your business.

When you join, sit back for a couple of days and follow conversation so you can get a feel for tone of discussion, people involved and what is customary among them. Then, introduce yourself as a new member (which also give you an opportunity to bring up subject of your business, website, product - within guidelines they set when you join).

An added benefit to marketing through discussion groups is fact that you will build new relationships with other business people that can lead to joint ventures, assistance and even friendship. In offline world, it is similar to being part of a chamber of commerce or other networking group and it works just as well on web.

At ParentPreneur Club, we have our own discussion group, PPC Advisory, where members brainstorm issues they face as work at home parents. To join, email < mailto:ppca-subscribe@topica.com > .

Here are more of my favorite groups targeted to work at home parents. You'll find others specific to your needs by searching for them at < http://www.yahoogroups.com > and < http://www.topica.com >