Because I believe that one of best venues for developing strong referral relationships is at a leads exchange group, and because of my roots in that arena I am asked all time about different groups and how to select "right" group. This is what I always say:

-- Talk to members and ask: Is there a large turnover rate?--why? Is it producing results or is it just a koffee klatch? What do they like/dislike about group? What have they learned since joining? How, besides receiving leads, have they benefited? Do they feel their best interests are being looked after?

-- Look at fees. How do fees compare with traditional methods of advertising? Ask yourself if it is cost effective,--not, "is it expensive?" Everyone seems to know cost of things, but not their value.

-- Consider group's structure. Some people like structure, some don't. The structured groups, which usually meet weekly, and allow only one person per occupation to join, tend to produce most results, and keep members focused on finding qualified leads for one another. Consider if structure suits your personality. Will you be able to adhere to rules and regulations? -- Check to see if there is an opportunity for you to take on a leadership role. This is really important as it gives you chance to show off how you do things. You will be seen as a leader and a good source of leads, which, in turn, will bring leads to you. Do an amazing job as a volunteer, and people will assume you'll do an amazing job in your professional life, too.

-- Be honest about your level of commitment. Will you be able to attend meetings regularly? Regular attendance is important for two reasons. First, it gives you opportunity to reinforce who you are and what you do over and over again so that when someone in group is in market for your product or service, you will be first person they think of. Secondly, regular attendance shows you care about OTHER members and their business growth. If you're not there to hear presentations of other members, what kind of a signal do you think you're sending? Remember, Networking Superstars (tm) go to these meetings to GIVE. Go with that attitude and you'll be on receiving end in no time.

An alternative to "learning hard way" is to learn by evolving - not easy but worth trip! You'll need to stay ever "present", be patient and courageous, practice and learn to trust your gut. You'll learn to recognize "red flags" life has given you and pay attention to them rather than neglecting messages completely. Evolving is about noticing that universe is asking you to do things differently. So, turn anything that isn't working into "feedback," and go from there. You're worth it! For my readers, as well as myself, I hold intention that our lessons will be learned from a place of "evolving."

The titles below are things I've heard new business owners say that usually invite painful lessons. Each summary includes some ways to evolve - grow, shift way you're thinking, and do things differently from get go. Been in business for while? Then look to see where you are "stuck" in development problems below - and evolve onwards!

"I need money, so I'll start a business." If you need money to pay for food, clothing or shelter, go get a job. If you have a job, keep it while you start a business. If you have at least two years worth of income plus $10,000 for business start-up costs, you have opportunity to work on your new business full time without having another income. If you start a business from a needy place, that is message that will come across to prospective clients. When you come from need, it shows in so many ways - most of which you're not even aware of because you're not one watching and listening to you.

"I hate my boss and I hate being told what to do, too." Keep you day job until you change your attitude. When you own your own company, it's your responsibility to make sure that everything gets done! And all your clients become mini-bosses!

"I don't need much start-up money because I'm not renting office space." Supplies, memberships, licenses fees, lawyers, accountants, desks, phones, business cards, lunches, phone service, web designers, logo designers, and hiring a coach/consultant. Guess what… they all cost money! Make sure you have enough money so that you can pay others while you build a strong solid business foundation. Keep asking yourself "what will be best use of my time" and consider bartering for services.

"I don't need a business plan for a home business." Wrong. Every business owner needs some sort of plan. At a minimum, start by designing a Dream Board . The business plan I send each client is called The One Page Business Plan. It's a fun business plan workbook (yes I said fun) and by completing book you'll have information for your brochure, website and more. My final note on business plans is this... if "doing it perfectly" has stopped you from starting a business plan, forget about owning a business! "Something" will always "come up" and life will change as much in business as it does anywhere. Business Plans are guides to be used wisely and to be looked at and adjusted every 6 months, too.

"I don't know who my ideal client is." If you know who your ideal client is, you can market effectively. Not sure who your ideal client is? See who you are attracting to your business, know what your professional values are, keep an index card around with your ideal client credentials. Knowing who you're marketing to will save you some money, too.

"I don't have any marketing plans." Design a marketing plan around ways you enjoy marketing, market with integrity, and learn how to stretch a little, too. Find ways to market that highlight other skills you have, allow you to do things that give you energy, and won't get boring as time goes on. Then every 6 months sit back and take a look-see what worked and what didn't. Make adjustments where necessary.