Sex With Your Ex

Written by Dr. Dorree Lynn

The death of a marriage must be mourned like any other lost relationship. It is often experienced as a death of family, of commitment, hope, or a dream. Dreams die-hard as there is nothing tangible about them and no place to putrepparttar “body.” When one is a widow or a widowerrepparttar 126319 entire world knows you have experienced a death and there are rituals to help you go throughrepparttar 126320 grieving process. When you get divorced, few who haven’t been there realizerepparttar 126321 suffering you go through and support is often brief or completely lacking. This is a time to reach out for help. Perhaps you should seek a divorce group, professional help, or spend time with really good friends?


You’ve gotten a divorce and you are sure you never want to see your ex spouse again. Sex was neverrepparttar 126322 real problem anyway, and certainly notrepparttar 126323 fundamental reason forrepparttar 126324 divorce. Then one night you get together and have dinner to talk aboutrepparttar 126325 kids. You’re feeling lonely and your mind goes blank unable to rememberrepparttar 126326 many bad times you had together. Now what was so awful about your ex anyway? Why did you get divorced? The next thing you know one thing leads to another and you’ve gone to bed together. Maybe this even happens more than once. You begin to wonder if there is anything wrong with this pull back torepparttar 126327 old and familiar. After all you have nothing else inrepparttar 126328 works right now anyway.

Going to bed with your ex is a lot more common than most people realize. A lot of divorcing partners have sex with their ex or soon to be ex at least once, usually, within a four to six month period after leaving when emotions are running up and down like a jumbo roller coaster ride. But,repparttar 126329 emotions involved with this kind of sexual encounter are quite different from those of a constant relationship belonging to a loving married couple.

Some individuals go to bed with their ex viewingrepparttar 126330 experience as “one last goodbye,” others as a way to convince themselves that what they thought always worked in their relationship really isn’trepparttar 126331 same anymore. And, still others see it as a safety net, satisfying their sexual need without having to maintainrepparttar 126332 total relationship.

The Death Of A Child

Written by Dr. Dorree Lynn

There may be nothing in life as devastating asrepparttar death of a child. Elders are supposed to pass on before their young. After all, that is nature's law. Yet, “Death hath no dominion.” And, life is not always fair.

The death of a young child isrepparttar 126318 single most powerful predictor of divorce. This is true because a parent's grief knows no bounds. Self-incrimination creeps in as does blame. Depression and desperation are common aftermaths of such an event. Most parents' natural instinct is to want to protect their young; to love, to nurture, and to help them grow. When a child dies, one's world tends to fall apart. Whether one believes in God or not, always there is a depression and anger, questioning and doubt before a parent can come to resolution and move on.

I have lived through too many such events, and sat with and known too many parents with shattered lives, not to know and understandrepparttar 126319 process. One must be brave, committed and usually seek help to survive as a loving couple.

Recently I was witness to one more family needing to find a way to survive their child's death. Only he wasn't a child anymore to anyone except his parents. In fact, this lovely young man in his early twenties was with his fiancée onrepparttar 126320 way to city hall to get their marriage license. They were looking forward to a life of “for better or worse” and maybe even one of “happily ever after.”

Very much in love, they were takingrepparttar 126321 train to their destination. He became ill and went torepparttar 126322 break betweenrepparttar 126323 cars to get some air. Suddenly, he fainted and fell torepparttar 126324 tracks. Chaos ensued. His fiancée has grieving and healing of her own to do. And, his parents, so filled with hopes of their own, a wedding to plan, visions of grandchildren, and a new generation to play with are now in mourning. Grieving, only as parents can.

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