I was sitting at my desk last week when my phone rang. I picked it up and said, "This is Ari with Unlock The Game." The woman on
other end of
phone said, "Hi, my name is Julie Jackson, I'm with XYZ company and we are a...and we offer...". As she continued to speak, I stopped her in mid-sentence and said, "Hi, Julie."There was dead silence on
phone.
I could sense her struggling to react to my spontaneous overture at making personal, genuine contact. She was so locked into her presentation or script that she had no idea how to respond to me.
The idea of just conversing with me in her most natural way was a completely foreign concept.
(She eventually took a deep breath and we transitioned into a very pleasant conversation about
possibility of us being a "fit".)
What has happened to us?
Can't we just strike up a conversation with people we don't know and build a relationship that way?
It's ironic that most of us take it for granted that spontaneous, natural communication is
right way to relate to our friends, spouses, relatives, and others in our personal lives -- but, when it comes to selling, our language becomes, almost robotic.
Why
breakdown?
Because when we make a sales call, we want something. The people we're talking with sense this immediately. They put up their guard. Our hidden agenda and their reaction immediately destroy
trust-building process of communication.
We go into our personal relationships wanting to simply know
other person. But we go into sales situations with agendas and assumptions.
And because we've been conditioned that a sale can happen only if we control
process, we never even consider
possibility that there can be total flexibility in how we communicate and build trust.