Certainly there is wisdom in knowing when to speak and when not to. Knowing politics of a situation or time constraints, you may choose not to speak. Often, though, you may have a unique view, perspective, issue or concern that needs to be raised. That contribution would add a new dimension to discussion or change decision about to be made.

You may feel strongly about a new policy and your silence allows folks to think you agree. Is that message you wish to send?

Recently I was involved in creation of a new management team for a department of a public sector organization. This brought together four people who previously had felt that they were in a 'pecking order' and changed them into a cohesive decision-making team. Two of four have strong opinions and are very comfortable expressing them. Two are very quiet. In forming team, we discussed this dynamic. How are we each going to best contribute to team? We talked about possibility that talkative two could overpower silent two. In fact, they might even do talking for them! Focusing on fact that each person was hired because he or she is an expert in a distinct field, it was soon decided that each person's opinion was vital to good decision-making.

The two who are quiet are very competent as are others. Increasing their level of comfort with adding their voices to group was important. Two things were agreed upon: every person would speak on every issue and each person would take responsibility for doing so. One of natural 'talkers' offered to ask quiet two for their opinions. This seems like a good idea on surface, however, as a rule, it is a poor idea.

Why is it a poor idea? Simple. If one person takes responsibility for contributions of others there are two new kinds of control being encouraged. The 'talker' has control over when others are asked for their opinions. The 'silent' could be waiting to be asked making their contribution 'talkers' responsibility. Neither of these options are optimal.

One writer gives following example: Imagine that a friend is quite late to meet you. Depending on what you THINK (i.e., she was in an accident, she's rude, I wanted to do something else anyway), you might be worried, annoyed, or relieved. These feelings (ignited by thoughts) will then dictate how you react, i.e., calling police, having angry words for her, or being glad she bailed on you.

What you think about your circumstances may keep you stuck in a bad situation. That is why recognizing lies you tell yourself is very important. These lies prevent you from being as powerful as you really are.

Lie #1. Expecting Quick Results. It's true, we have all seen our lives change in a heartbeat - sometimes an upturn, and sometimes a downturn. But generally success is a longer road that takes daily work to make it a reality. It will happen. Don't expect it to happen overnight, but expect it to happen. Don't give up. Powerful Results come from taking baby steps, one after another, day after day, until you reach your goal.

Lie #2. Complaining is OK. The Law of Attraction states that life reflects back to you whatever you expend. If you have a habit of complaining, you will attract more complainers to you. Or as Bible puts it, "you reap what you sow." One of my favorite cartoons shows character contemplating Spring, and she says, "Time to go out in garden to see if bulbs I didn't plant, didn't come up." Powerful Results come from planting seeds for what you want to grow.