Rindercella - The Pyslexic Drincess

Written by http://www.gigglestop.com

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful young girl called Rindercella.

Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion.

Rindercella worked very hard frubbing scloors, emptying poss pits and shivelling shot. Atrepparttar end ofrepparttar 118109 day she was knucking fackered.

The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, andrepparttar 118110 other was called Betty Swallocks. They were real forrible huckers. They had featy sweet and featy swannies.

The sugly isters had tockets to go torepparttar 118111 ball, butrepparttar 118112 cotton runts wouldn't let Rindercella go.

Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her Gairy Fodmother appeared.

Her name was Cupid Stunt and she was a light rucking fesbian with a twig bat.

She turned a pumpkin and mix sice into a hucking cuge farriage, and six dandy ronkeys with buge hillocks and dig bicks.

The Gairy Fodmother told Rindercella to be back by midnight or there would be a cucking falamity.

Atrepparttar 118113 ball Rindercella was dancing withrepparttar 118114 Pransome Hince, when suddenlyrepparttar 118115 clock struck twelve.


Written by Rev. James L. Snyder

Memory is a very tricky thing, at least for me it is. Looking back, over a year's span of activity my memory seems to pick and choose what it remembers. It amazes me not so much what a person remembers but what a person forgets.

Often some old-timer will moan about how much he missesrepparttar good old days. I'm not sure if he is thinking of World War II orrepparttar 118108 great Depression. I'm positive that duringrepparttar 118109 great Depression some wonderful memories were created, but I'm not sure anyone wants to return to those thrilling days of yesterday.

The bad was not as bad as we remember andrepparttar 118110 good was not as good as we boast.

Some things are best forgotten and some things should never be forgotten; my trouble has always been remembering which is which. (Personally, I don't knowrepparttar 118111 difference between "which" and "that.")

Several things aboutrepparttar 118112 old year bear serious consideration. The past year, in my opinion, was not just one year but several years flowing together. Sometimes I'm not sure which year I lived.

The year 2004, like all its brothers before it, actually consisted of three years.

First, there isrepparttar 118113 year that really was. "Justrepparttar 118114 facts, ma'am."

I'm a little fuzzy about this one. For one thing, looking at my checkbook entries (at leastrepparttar 118115 ones I remembered to enter)repparttar 118116 past year was a completely different one than I recall.

I really do not recollect having allrepparttar 118117 fun indicated by my bank statement. Why is it that no matter how much money I put into my bank account, more money comes out.

Evidently, some phantom creature has access to my checkbook.

President Ronald Reagan was accused of voodoo economics. Reviewing my bank statements, I could be accused of "Who-do" economics.

My income tax statement is another perplexity. I can never figure it out. Ifrepparttar 118118 government said I made that much money, I must have made that much money and owe that much in taxes.

Speaking ofrepparttar 118119 government, what I don't understand is how they know how much I owe, torepparttar 118120 penny, along with millions of other Americans and cannot find Osama bin Laden. I know exactly how to solve this conundrum.

One surefire way of finding him is leaking torepparttar 118121 government that Osama bin Laden owes taxes and he will be caught before April 15, guaranteed.

Second, there isrepparttar 118122 year I re-member.

By Rev. James L. Snyder

This year is much shorter thanrepparttar 118123 previous one, for some odd reason. The year I remember had only two months; this month and last month. And believe me, "last month" is a stretch for me.

Honestly, I remember payingrepparttar 118124 electric bill, contrary to whatrepparttar 118125 electric company says. My problem withrepparttar 118126 electric company is that duringrepparttar 118127 space of a year they send me 12 bills and I can only remember two.

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