Relationship Deal-breakers

Written by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

The following article is offered for free use in your ezine, print publication or on your web site, so long asrepparttar author resource box atrepparttar 121998 end is included, with hyperlinks. Notification of publication would be appreciated.

Title: Relationship Deal-breakers Author: Margaret Paul, Ph.D. E-mail: Copyright: © 2005 by Margaret Paul URL: Word Count: 802 Category: Relationships

Relationship Deal-breakers By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

Inrepparttar 121999 37 years that I have been counseling couples, I have discovered that there are only a few issues that are true relationship deal-breakers. Many ofrepparttar 122000 issues that tear relationships apart are not actual deal-breakers. Rather, most divorces and breakups arerepparttar 122001 result of one or both partnerís unwillingness to learn fromrepparttar 122002 conflicts that exist in all primary relationships. But some conflicts and differences are actual deal-breakers.


Early in my career as a psychotherapist, I worked with Mary and Cal. Mary and Cal met when Mary was 38 and Cal was 47. Cal had been married before and had two adult children, while Mary had never been married. Cal made it very clear to Mary that he did not, under any circumstances, want more children. Mary seemed to accept this, but secretly hoped to change Calís mind once they were married.

A year after they were married, Mary brought uprepparttar 122003 issue of having children. Cal was appalled. He felt angry, trapped and betrayed by Maryís secret hope, as well as by her dishonesty. Mary begged and pleaded, hoping Calís love for her would soften his position. But he stayed committed to his decision not to have any more children.

This situation has a very sad ending. Mary was devastated. She loved Cal, but having children was actually extremely important to her. She didnít want to leave him and she couldnít let go of wanting a child. The stress ofrepparttar 122004 situation eventually eroded her immune system and she died of ovarian cancer of few years after bringing uprepparttar 122005 baby issue.

I learned a lot from Mary and Calís experience. I learned thatrepparttar 122006 baby issue is a deal-breaker. It is not healthy for someone who really wants a baby to give that up, and it is not healthy for someone who does not want a baby to go along with having one. This deep and basic issue needs to be dealt with head-on, early in a relationship, before people move ahead with commitment and marriage.


Rhonda and Fred fell in love in their late 30ís. Each had jobs that they loved and that were very important to them. Fred wasrepparttar 122007 vice-president of a large company, while Rhonda had a flourishing practice as a pediatrician. They both lived in Los Angeles. All seemed fine until an incredible opportunity opened up for Fred Ė one that he had always dreamed of. The problem was that it meant moving to New York. Fredís work became a deal-breaker.


Written by Sara Haese

Youíve probably heard about Saverepparttar Dates since they have become quite popular with brides but you might not know exactly what purpose they serve.

Peopleís lives are getting increasingly busier and more tightly scheduled so thatís where Saverepparttar 121997 Date announcements come in handy. You want to make sure that your guests, especially family and close friends, keeprepparttar 121998 date of your wedding open when planning their schedules. To ensure this, youíll want to consider sending out Saverepparttar 121999 Date notices shortly after you have set your wedding date, especially if itís several months inrepparttar 122000 future or around a holiday.

Proper etiquette doesnít dictate that these advance notices have to be sent but in todayís world it helps your guests in their planning so they can be sure to be with you sharing inrepparttar 122001 celebration of one ofrepparttar 122002 most important days of your life. If you do decide to send them out, you are not required to send them to every one of your guests but youíll probably want to at least include close family members and friends. Guests who will have to travel to be in attendance will find them especially helpful for giving them plenty of travel preparation time particularly if you are having a destination wedding.

Itís easy to be creative when sending out your Saverepparttar 122003 Dates since there are so many different varieties and designs available.

ēMagnets have become a favorite selection and why not since your guests can easily stick them onto their refrigerator as their reminder. Some magnets haverepparttar 122004 option of including a photo and some actually show a calendar of your wedding date month with your date circled for easy reference.

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