Queen Shopper for a Day

Written by Joyce C. Lock

Though there was a bit of snow still left onrepparttar ground, it was a bright sunny day. Looking outsiderepparttar 118095 window,repparttar 118096 sun's glow compelled me to draw closer torepparttar 118097 window, to bask in its warmth. Oh, that was so neat! It felt like Spring had arrived!

So, I (this person who vowed to never experiencerepparttar 118098 outdoors until winter had passed) decided to briefly enjoyrepparttar 118099 weather and took off for a quick shopping spree; dressed in apparent Spring apparel, as I like to plan ahead.

Of course, all was decently warm, as I got into my non-heated but sheltered car, parked insiderepparttar 118100 garage. Ok, so it was a little chilly. But, being brave as I am, I knew I could handle it.

Though I forget whatrepparttar 118101 initial temperature read, I'm thinking it might have been inrepparttar 118102 upper thirties (onrepparttar 118103 inside ofrepparttar 118104 garage). Still optimistic, upper 30's wasn't too bad; as long as I didn't stay out doors for very long.

Wow! My kids would be so proud of me, venturing out like this. And hey,repparttar 118105 roads weren't too bad; another sign of it being a warmer day.

My first stop was at Menards, to make a return and to check out any new rebate offers.

As I got out of my car, it seemed a bit more chilly than expected. So, I walked a bit briskly to get inside ... andrepparttar 118106 closest door was plenty good enough for me.

There were only a couple rebate opportunities worth considering. However, Christmas decorations were now 75% off. So, I ventured over to those isles and choose 3 rolls of Christmas wrapping paper that I had previously noticed, and sort of liked; only, I hadn't likedrepparttar 118107 price before.

Then, while going through check out,repparttar 118108 cashier discovered thatrepparttar 118109 price of these rolls had already been reduced 75% and, after inquiry to be certain,repparttar 118110 cashier took another 75% off. So, that made this nicer wrapping paper only 22 cents per roll! Oh, my stars! I had struck gold!

However,repparttar 118111 manager on duty didn't think it would be a good idea for me to return intorepparttar 118112 store, with my already purchased merchandise. And, brave as I was, only once was enough for having to go outdoors again.

So, with receipt in hand, I parked my cart and grabbed another one handy, then returned to Menards' collection of 'left over' Christmas wrapping paper; no doubt 'left over' only because they had originally charged an arm and a leg for these babies. But, spendthrift as I am, I had kept my limbs perfectly in tact.

And of course, with a deal like this and me with nine grandchildren, I was quick to clean Menards out of all their nicer wrapping paper.

Altogether, it was only fifty-one rolls. Sure, some rolls only had 10 ft. of paper on them. Though, I'll have some ofrepparttar 118113 prettiest packages in town; ok, for maybe two, three, or four years. But, hey, who's counting?

As forrepparttar 118114 remaining customers who suddenly leftrepparttar 118115 check out lanes, "Too late, ladies, they're all mine!"

But, as you might have guessed, being that Menards is quite frugal in bagging their merchandise, it was work gettingrepparttar 118116 paper to not fall out ofrepparttar 118117 cart. Fortunately, in my great wisdom and strategic planning, I had parked close torepparttar 118118 exit door.

Now, to facerepparttar 118119 cold. (There is a reason why we call it 'bitter. It actually hurts!) I hurried to get those rolls torepparttar 118120 trunk and only dropped one as I skidded towardrepparttar 118121 car.

Do you know how many times it takes to put fifty-one rolls into a trunk while only picking up three rolls at a time, so not to also have to pick up others offrepparttar 118122 ground? Ok, so you have bigger hands. Well, good for you. I'll let you help, next time.

A true roommate story-psyco surfer

Written by dan the roommate man

My worst roommate (and I've had some bad ones) was on my semester at Tel-Aviv University. It started onrepparttar group flight there, with this obnoxious surfer looking guy who was seated next to me (I was on an aisle, he was inrepparttar 118094 middle). Onrepparttar 118095 ten hour flight, he had me put something in or take something out ofrepparttar 118096 overhead for him at least fifteen or twenty times. He just wouldn't leave me alone, and was constantly begging me to change seats with him, and grab a pen, and put this card in his bag... When we got torepparttar 118097 dorms and had our orientation meeting, it turned out that I was inrepparttar 118098 same apartment as him, though thank god notrepparttar 118099 same room (each apt was 2 double rooms with a common kitchen and bath).

This guy was unreal. He was a bleach-blond surfer, rowed crew, was well over 6' and very muscular (I'm 5'7" and thin), and just a total jerk. He constantly aterepparttar 118100 food belonging torepparttar 118101 rest of us, claiming that he had no money, nevermindrepparttar 118102 $100 packages full of crap he'd send back to his girlfriend in CA. After two weeks or so of his constantly disrespectingrepparttar 118103 other three of us, things got a bit tense. The first turning point was when he used an entire pack of my roommate's razors to shave part of his head, and from then on he seemed to be in ever-lessening contact with reality.

About a month into his stay, he decided to adopt a stray dog that he found nearrepparttar 118104 beach while surfing. This, of course, couldn't happen, because you can't have dogs inrepparttar 118105 dorms, andrepparttar 118106 rest of us weren't too keen on having a stray dog around. Jason,repparttar 118107 psycho, completely lost it when he was told he couldn't keeprepparttar 118108 dog ("if he goes, I go, because he'srepparttar 118109 only one who understands me"). He got right in my face and threatened to kill me if I turned him in (remember our size and strength disparities...), since I wasrepparttar 118110 only one who was home when he came charging in with this poor mutt. Later that day, afterrepparttar 118111 security guards andrepparttar 118112 program people told himrepparttar 118113 dog had to go, he took off, and wasn't heard from for a couple of days.

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